Hello one and all!
So with the new found confidence I discovered in a bar last week down in Bedford's grim town centre of a Friday night I battled the storms and winter weather just as everyone else did admit Storm Emma and the dreaded Beast from The East. England and the rest of the UK was in for a chilly reminder that winter is yet to be over this last week and whilst it is nearly Easter and should be all spring time sunshine, flowers, bunnies and lambs - This is far from the reality of Blighty weather.
With apply named Beast from The East, the colder weather coming across from Russia being blown by Siberia and picking up some icy chills on the way the temperatures plummeted to rival the sinking of the Titanic and blizzard snow's hampering travel plans and all manner of daily activities life for some across the British Isles this week has not been great. All was but for a minor inconvenience until Storm Emma forcing the MET Office to issue a red weather warning foreboding to a loss of life should people be caught up in the outside winds of 70mph coupled with the already existing polar vortex from Beast from The East with forecasts for -15C wind chills and snowdrifts nearly as tall as you. Yes you!
As the snow fell carnage descended as shelves were left empty as shoppers (and general idiots) grabbed everything they could (including wiping one Tesco I went into completely of cake) in order to brave the potentially long winter nights ahead. Delays of two hours were a pleasant surprise for some people where others were stuck for hours or sometimes a couple of days on end in the middle of motorways and A-roads up and down the country.
Call me cynical and don't get me wrong I don't live very far North of London so weather here in the comfy Home-Counties was not adverse by anyone's standards but I just don't get it when people freak the fuck out about a little bit of the white stuff. I mean it is to be expected, we are an island off the coast of some of the coldest places in the entire world; Russia, Siberia, Iceland and the Artie just to name a few, and that's not including places right on our door step like Scotland, Norway and Sweden all suffering from much snowier weather during the winter months. But they deal with it in a much better way. Heated paths and walkways so people don't slip over and better public transport that doesn't just break under the strain of a few snowflakes. I understand that for the UK the methods used in other countries are both costly and something that would not necessarily be beneficial for the people of England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland but it does question about how they seem to have got a grip on things over there when the weather gets bad.
Now I get that not everyone was that lucky enough like me and Mr. Warehouse to have the snow disappear on Saturday Afternoon as it did in Bedfordshire. I understand that to be in a car for over sixteen-hours potentially with a newborn baby with little or no water or food and only a blanket to keep warm or if you were stuck at home awaiting an ambulance to come and help you when you need it most it is not ideal and when weather is poor it only exasperates the situation and makes it worse. I, like others, have watched the news and listened to the radio hearing stories of wonderful community spirit and people being labelled as Snow Angels for the acts of heroism from John O'Groats to Lands End and everywhere in-between. And it is those moments that make me proud to be British, regardless of the weather - Come rain or shine we all stick together!
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
Showing posts with label Cold. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cold. Show all posts
Monday, 5 March 2018
Monday, 8 January 2018
Welcome to Slim-uary!
Hello,
So as the chill sets in and everyone appears to be battening down the hatches in preparation for bad weather and a lack of social interaction due to the fact that nobody has any money for at least another fortnight or so. And here I am feeling like I have money to burn. The struggle is real and I am starting to wonder why I ever chose to not book a holiday early this year. You see after all my work colleagues had booked last minute holidays, all of them snatching up all the great bargains and good deals, leaving Mr Warehouse and I in a bit of a tizz as to why we have spent nearly seven-hundred quid on such a holiday that was barely worth half that.
With this in mind, 2018 will probably be our last big holiday until we own a home. This is why I am looking to go on an all expenses extra kind of holiday. Where to you ask but the thing is nobody knows. Well that is until about six to eight weeks before we fly that is. I would like to go somewhere warm and ideally long haul. Maybe America, Mexico, Caribbean or Hawaii? Who knows I may end up in Thailand eating noodles from some back end bar and having to pull Mr. Warehouse away from the Lady-boys! I am sure that where ever and when ever we book it will be magical and something to treasure whilst we save like squirrels for our house.
With the weather in England as unpredictable as my my hair colour (Blue, pink, orange, red - You name it we've been there) it is far too early to start thinking about summer yet. Now I am sure that you are just as eager as I am, ready and waiting to strip off, ready to hit the beach in a new bikini and have everyone turn to look at you. However the only reason that I think anybody would be looking my way on holiday is to see what a state I was or to clear the road to the buffet cart.
OK so I may jest a little about my weight and in no uncertain terms and I taking the piss out of people that heavier or larger. You are beautiful each and everyone of you. Your bodies do fantastic things like keep you alive and bore you children. You should appreciate them and all that they do for you. So why am I hear bashing myself about my own weight you may say. Well, that is because I'm not happy with myself in the dress size I am. For what seems like year after year has now started to turn into decade after decade and despite being only in my mid-twenties, I feel like I dress like somebody ten-years older than me. I want to feel beautiful and for people to compliment me for once and actually mean it.
Rightly or wrongly I know that people, sadly mostly my family, make passing comments about my weight and have done for many years. My family has always been big especially on my father's side and with the recent deterioration of my grandfather and his health, I can only assume that his lifestyle choices will probably be the end of him. And sadly I have no sympathy for him. Don't get me wrong I fully empathise with his situation and following retirement from what was a very active lifestyle jumping in and out of lorries all day he is now fully bed-bound and in need of round the clock care. It is sad and upsetting to see him in this way especially when he has had such a huge influence on my life. We are not very close by any means but that does not mean that I do not care for him very much and it worries me to think that this time next year he may not be with us.
Maybe this is why I have joined a local gym and started a better and more healthier eating plan. I have signed up to you and been attending personal training sessions for the last few weeks with some astonishing figures that even I did not expect. In the last 6 weeks I have lost over ten-centimetres off my waist along with over seven-centimetres off my hips and sadly one-centimetres off my bust! Sad Face! And I don't want to be down to a size stupid, pottering around with a head bigger than my daily intake of calories and a waist the same circumference as a tangerine (Which by the way I would not able to eat since it was not vegan friendly, gluten free or multivitamin infused). I would however like to enjoy my summer prancing around in the sunshine, wearing a kitsch tea dress and looking as curvy and cute as I did back in college all whilst cramming down a hot-dog or two.
I want to enjoy my food as well as my figure and wardrobe. I don't really think that I should have to compromise on either in order to have a good time or indeed enjoy life. I would like to say that by the time the annual family fun day at work is in full swing and Mr Warehouse and I are preparing for another year celebrating a pool and darts tournament in aid of his grandfather I would like to be at least one dress size smaller than I am now. Hopefully I can get there however it will probably be quite a lot of hard work, determination and willpower. Now where did I put my kale and avocado smoothie ...
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
So as the chill sets in and everyone appears to be battening down the hatches in preparation for bad weather and a lack of social interaction due to the fact that nobody has any money for at least another fortnight or so. And here I am feeling like I have money to burn. The struggle is real and I am starting to wonder why I ever chose to not book a holiday early this year. You see after all my work colleagues had booked last minute holidays, all of them snatching up all the great bargains and good deals, leaving Mr Warehouse and I in a bit of a tizz as to why we have spent nearly seven-hundred quid on such a holiday that was barely worth half that.
With this in mind, 2018 will probably be our last big holiday until we own a home. This is why I am looking to go on an all expenses extra kind of holiday. Where to you ask but the thing is nobody knows. Well that is until about six to eight weeks before we fly that is. I would like to go somewhere warm and ideally long haul. Maybe America, Mexico, Caribbean or Hawaii? Who knows I may end up in Thailand eating noodles from some back end bar and having to pull Mr. Warehouse away from the Lady-boys! I am sure that where ever and when ever we book it will be magical and something to treasure whilst we save like squirrels for our house.
With the weather in England as unpredictable as my my hair colour (Blue, pink, orange, red - You name it we've been there) it is far too early to start thinking about summer yet. Now I am sure that you are just as eager as I am, ready and waiting to strip off, ready to hit the beach in a new bikini and have everyone turn to look at you. However the only reason that I think anybody would be looking my way on holiday is to see what a state I was or to clear the road to the buffet cart.
OK so I may jest a little about my weight and in no uncertain terms and I taking the piss out of people that heavier or larger. You are beautiful each and everyone of you. Your bodies do fantastic things like keep you alive and bore you children. You should appreciate them and all that they do for you. So why am I hear bashing myself about my own weight you may say. Well, that is because I'm not happy with myself in the dress size I am. For what seems like year after year has now started to turn into decade after decade and despite being only in my mid-twenties, I feel like I dress like somebody ten-years older than me. I want to feel beautiful and for people to compliment me for once and actually mean it.
Rightly or wrongly I know that people, sadly mostly my family, make passing comments about my weight and have done for many years. My family has always been big especially on my father's side and with the recent deterioration of my grandfather and his health, I can only assume that his lifestyle choices will probably be the end of him. And sadly I have no sympathy for him. Don't get me wrong I fully empathise with his situation and following retirement from what was a very active lifestyle jumping in and out of lorries all day he is now fully bed-bound and in need of round the clock care. It is sad and upsetting to see him in this way especially when he has had such a huge influence on my life. We are not very close by any means but that does not mean that I do not care for him very much and it worries me to think that this time next year he may not be with us.
Maybe this is why I have joined a local gym and started a better and more healthier eating plan. I have signed up to you and been attending personal training sessions for the last few weeks with some astonishing figures that even I did not expect. In the last 6 weeks I have lost over ten-centimetres off my waist along with over seven-centimetres off my hips and sadly one-centimetres off my bust! Sad Face! And I don't want to be down to a size stupid, pottering around with a head bigger than my daily intake of calories and a waist the same circumference as a tangerine (Which by the way I would not able to eat since it was not vegan friendly, gluten free or multivitamin infused). I would however like to enjoy my summer prancing around in the sunshine, wearing a kitsch tea dress and looking as curvy and cute as I did back in college all whilst cramming down a hot-dog or two.
I want to enjoy my food as well as my figure and wardrobe. I don't really think that I should have to compromise on either in order to have a good time or indeed enjoy life. I would like to say that by the time the annual family fun day at work is in full swing and Mr Warehouse and I are preparing for another year celebrating a pool and darts tournament in aid of his grandfather I would like to be at least one dress size smaller than I am now. Hopefully I can get there however it will probably be quite a lot of hard work, determination and willpower. Now where did I put my kale and avocado smoothie ...
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
Monday, 19 January 2015
Like Waiting For A Bus ...
Evening everybody,
Hope all is well in the land of wherever you be reading, fine fellows. Here in Blightly as some of you may have noticed is fucking freezing. Quite literally - It was snowing here in the 'Shire. Which is why I now in my toasty little flat with a blanket draped over my legs. Yes. I am naked as I write and as brutally honest I could be much more honest with you all on some of my most recent feelings, but I shall not dwell on them before I have to. All in good time. Instead I thought I may share some warmth with you and try my hand at some erotic fiction. Now I must warn you that this is maybe not for the faint hearted and nor should you be reading whilst your Boss is in the same room, besides shouldn't you be managing an Excel Spreadsheet or drafting up a letter. For this is something special, a personal experience, and one that I will never forget - All I can say is ... FINALLY!
Enjoy!
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
---
"Its too much. I need you. Now." she pants in his ear. "Take me" she says in deep, hushed tones. Breathing heavy and kissing passionately he grasps her neck and face in his manly hands, tugging playfully on her long locks and she knows to return the favour running her deft fingers through his hair. Holding the nape of her neck as he kisses her - Long, passionate, meaningful kisses. This is making the tension between them harder to resist.
Slowly she trails her hands to his crotch, playing with the waistband, teasing making him feel the pressure as much she is. Inch by inch she gradually makes it into his tight underwear. Feeling him throbbing in her soft hands she moves him up and down, pacing them both until their breathing gets to the same speed. Feeling him succumb to her charms was exhilarating and knowing this just by looking into his eyes and hearing him groan, she moves faster until he cant take it no more. Releasing himself she ran her fingers along his silky shaft whilst he kissed and bit at her décolletage.
Grabbing at her waist, he shifted her so she was finally underneath him, revealing the silken bedsheets swaddling the make-shift bed. Looking into each others eyes lust takes hold and suddenly they are pulling at each others clothes violently trying to get them off as quickly as possible, sensually making-out as they undressed. As she ruffles her fingers through his hair, he moves south and in the knowledge of how moist she was, he tugs off her underwear. Finally he bury's his head between her strong, toned thighs and with a strong hold on her pelvis begins to taste her, as hot as the tension between them. She could feel herself getting higher. He could feel it too as they entwine their fingers, steadily climbing to the peak. Again it gets too much for her to handle and just before she climaxes he stops and join's her in the Northern-hemisphere.
Hope all is well in the land of wherever you be reading, fine fellows. Here in Blightly as some of you may have noticed is fucking freezing. Quite literally - It was snowing here in the 'Shire. Which is why I now in my toasty little flat with a blanket draped over my legs. Yes. I am naked as I write and as brutally honest I could be much more honest with you all on some of my most recent feelings, but I shall not dwell on them before I have to. All in good time. Instead I thought I may share some warmth with you and try my hand at some erotic fiction. Now I must warn you that this is maybe not for the faint hearted and nor should you be reading whilst your Boss is in the same room, besides shouldn't you be managing an Excel Spreadsheet or drafting up a letter. For this is something special, a personal experience, and one that I will never forget - All I can say is ... FINALLY!
Enjoy!
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
---
It was a cold and blustery evening in late December when the young, blonde and her current partner, were lying on a pull out sofa-bed, watching junk TV and scoffing even junkier food. After hours of relaxing and laughing in each others company the mood suddenly changed. With the mind racing (and somehow playing Barry White at the same time), she experienced her lovers hot kisses, leaving light wet stains down her pale neck as he trailed down her warm body. In vain, she tried to keep her breathing slow and steady whilst allowing her spirit to be taken over. Hearts starting to skip, beating harder and faster making the young women breathe heavier as he went even lower. As he cups her supple breasts in each hand she whispers for him to take her nipples to his lips and begin to nibble and suck lightly making her moan softly, throw her head back in pleasure, long, blonde hair tumbling over the both of them, cascading down her voluptuous body.
"I can feel myself getting wetter with every kiss you place on my smooth skin" she says as he tugs on her chest once more, swiftly making her convulse with pleasure. Slowly his hands start to run across her warm stomach and down to the hips where he holds them tightly, pressing his palms into her pelvis to stopping her body writhing from the pleasure.
"Its too much. I need you. Now." she pants in his ear. "Take me" she says in deep, hushed tones. Breathing heavy and kissing passionately he grasps her neck and face in his manly hands, tugging playfully on her long locks and she knows to return the favour running her deft fingers through his hair. Holding the nape of her neck as he kisses her - Long, passionate, meaningful kisses. This is making the tension between them harder to resist.
Slowly she trails her hands to his crotch, playing with the waistband, teasing making him feel the pressure as much she is. Inch by inch she gradually makes it into his tight underwear. Feeling him throbbing in her soft hands she moves him up and down, pacing them both until their breathing gets to the same speed. Feeling him succumb to her charms was exhilarating and knowing this just by looking into his eyes and hearing him groan, she moves faster until he cant take it no more. Releasing himself she ran her fingers along his silky shaft whilst he kissed and bit at her décolletage.
Grabbing at her waist, he shifted her so she was finally underneath him, revealing the silken bedsheets swaddling the make-shift bed. Looking into each others eyes lust takes hold and suddenly they are pulling at each others clothes violently trying to get them off as quickly as possible, sensually making-out as they undressed. As she ruffles her fingers through his hair, he moves south and in the knowledge of how moist she was, he tugs off her underwear. Finally he bury's his head between her strong, toned thighs and with a strong hold on her pelvis begins to taste her, as hot as the tension between them. She could feel herself getting higher. He could feel it too as they entwine their fingers, steadily climbing to the peak. Again it gets too much for her to handle and just before she climaxes he stops and join's her in the Northern-hemisphere.
As he clutches something long and pink, bought by someone old, he smiles knowing just what an impact this joyous stick will provide. Smiling he slowly caresses her lower body with the vibrations, holding it close to her making it even more intense and highly-strung than before. She was so sensitive. So moist. So ready. He can tell just how amazing this feels for her and getting more and more excited himself he continues to stimulate her Nether-Region. Harder he presses. Faster he moves. Deeper he thrusts into her and higher she climbs. Oh god. More! More! Please! She begged him to pull her in closer and hold her as she climaxed. Getting hotter she felt the waves she had read about and heard tales of so many times as her and her friends sat around at dinner discussing it. Rolling waves of heat and chill soon enough lead her to the peak. Eye rolling, back arched, body uncontrollably shaking and quivering with excitement she came, her world crashing around her in a spectacular first ever orgasm. He wasn't about to give up though and getting off himself in this torturous pleasure-game as mere seconds later it was in another blazing glory that she climaxed again, coming a second and a third time.
In the moments that followed he wanted her for himself and as they spend moments staring into each others eyes, all she wants is to feel him inside her, getting deeper and harder. She does not have long to wait as he teases his way into her, prizing her legs apart and squeezing her waist as he enters slowly. Gasping as she feels him stretching her and letting out a little moan he starts to get harder, tensing his manhood as he thrusts into her once more making her cry out in pleasure. She knew by his contorted face that he was not far behind and as she tightened herself around him. She could feel him. All of him. As she whispered breathlessly sweet nothings into his ear and softly bit the earlobes of her partner, he held down her hips, his grip getting harder he let out the longest, deepest, animalistic groan she had ever heard. She felt the shudders from his core as he groaned once more, finishing deep and hard.
Exhausted he collapses, snuggling his head into her breasts. There they lye for a while as she plays with his face until he pulls her into his chest where they fall asleep in each others arms, both of them blissfully unaware of the world outside and just how different it is, now she has experienced her first orgasm that is!
Monday, 24 November 2014
Walking in a Winter Wonderland!
Morning guys and gals,
So as I am sure you can all guess by the title this week I have officially started my countdown to Christmas 2014, although I am pretty sure that started back in September when I began buying presents for everyone. And so as the pennies and pounds start dribbling fast out of my bank account on stocking fillers and the extra bottles of plonk for the big day I am getting increasingly more and more excited. This weekend however, I spent some Q.T with that big bear in my life, Mr. Warehouse but I am pleased to say that whilst we are officially now dating (Eeek, scary) I am wholly devoted to my girls, Miss Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee.
Saturday morning I was roused by something hard digging into my spine. Slowly coming round to the winter sun streaming through my window and the chilliness that lay on the other side of the duvet I realised that I hadn't fallen asleep with my back against Pinocchio's face, it was just my Boyfriend! Oh dear lord its even weird writing let alone saying it! And with a swift burst of energy I was wide awake and heavenly satisfied once more. With both of us out on prior engagements we decided pillow talk was best kept short and sweet so I slung on my Christmas jumper and a brand new pair of super tight skinnies and headed for the kettle.
Monging around for a few hours before we both had to leave, Mr. Warehouse was like a puppy following me around and feeling sorry for himself that we wouldn't be spending the day together. I stood my ground though and whilst I felt bad that I wouldn't be able to celebrate at one of his many family events I had my own family to attend to. Boarding a train I sipped on my iced-coffee from AMT called a 'Froffee' and it is literally to die for, Pret do something similar and again I would easily kill for one! Anyway, as the train pulled up to the station I once called home I saw my friends faces eagerly anticipating my arrival. As I got off and ushered them all to get on and grab a seat I was introduced to some familiar sounding names and a couple of familiar faces. Chatting as we raced down to London I could tell we were all excited for our day out in the big smoke. On the agenda was dinner at TGI Fridays in Leicester Square and then to head on over to Hyde Park for what seems to be now for me an annual trip to Winter Wonderland.
As we stormed into London I felt an almost overwhelming sense of anxiousness take me over. I hadn't been back here since Mr. Cheese and I was worried about how I would feel now being back. I wasn't to worry though as I think the Tweedle's sensed something may be amiss. As we disembarked the train and headed out of St. Pancras Station I felt everyone surround me and whilst I know it sounds stupid I felt supported and happy to have them there. I honestly don't know how I would have felt or reacted on my own or with anyone else for that matter. The fact that I was on the brink of wetting myself probably helped with taking my mind off things but as we walked past my beloved Starbucks I couldn't help but think of the moment back in February when Mr. Cheese and I parted.
Toilet stops done and out the way we headed for the Tubes. Feeling like I was somewhat at home again I strategically guided us through the mixture of tourists and weekend workers to Leicester Square. Looking around and seeing the sights I was once so familiar with we all gazed around in wonder like children as we conversed, waiting for Miss Tweedle-Dumb's other half to arrive in from Berkshire. Once all eight of us were together we headed on up to the spectacular M&M World, right in the heart of the Strip. Even before we walked in you could smell the sweet, creamy chocolatey flavours just wafting through the air. As we elbowed our way through the crowds and looked at overpriced merchandise all of us came to realise that this was a pure novelty and no expense was going to be made by this Octo-gang today! And after a disappointment with TGI's not having a table for eight available we ended up going to Chiquitos instead. Not as good as the independent Mexican Mr. Cheese took me to in Victoria but alright I guess for a quick and easy dinner with the odd game of 'Chinese Whispers'. That was until the restaurant royally fucked up the bill more than twice. In the end I think we had all had enough of the stupid flavoured popcorn and overly priced cocktails and left.
Now was for the real party time! Braving the chilly November air we stepped back out into the city, heading over to the Underground once more, this time ending up at Marble Arch, albeit a rather long-winded route. Dodging some busy traffic speeding across four lanes and singing Christmas songs all the way down the Mall we finally arrived. You could see it from a distance, you always could but somehow it looked better the closer you got. One quick battery change later and I was S-elf-ie ready (see what I did there, aha!) and it wasn't long before we were all posing for funny shot with smiles on our faces and noses pink. Once we had come to terms with the magical light source the Tweedles, Boyfriend and work colleagues all followed straight to the fastest rides we could see. A blizzard thing was happening and with Miss Tweedle-Dumb squealing at the sight of synthetic, sudsy, soap-snow I knew that there was no backing down from this. We were going on that ride.
After taking out a second mortgage to pay for the ride tokens we waited patiently whilst as Swedish Accented European spoke to us explaining about his day and the Winter Wonderland we were enchanted with. Finally it was our turn and being front of the queue meant we had the choice of seats. Bagging ourselves a couple of blue pods, Miss Tweedle-Dumb and I took one pod whilst Miss JoHo and another work colleague of the Tweedles took the other. A quick snap before the ride set off and we all started screaming like children right away. Loving the atmosphere I never wanted it to end as we whizzed around and around, lights blurring as we reached new speeds. Looking over at Miss Tweedle-Dumb I squeaked in happiness and was grateful to be in her company. Faces melting into the burning bulbs I could hardly keep my eyes open as the ride got even faster. Almost at a right angle now I could see nothing but colour. Feeling nauseous I continued to scream, egging the controller on to go even faster. As the ride slowed and came to an end I literally felt exhausted and slightly queasy. I wasn't the only one for the looks on Miss Tweedle-Dumb's face as well as her work friends was equally pale but happy.
One packet of half eaten Churros and several rides later, the Octo-Gang confirmed it was time to go home. Money spent, feet hurting and my patience running thin I just wanted to get back to my bed although habit told me that would be at least another couple of hours away, from door to door. Looking back on the glow of Hyde park as it slipped behind the sparse tree-lined avenues I wondered what next year would hold for me. Would I be returning with my friends again? Maybe with a new set of friends? Maybe with Mr. Warehouse? Maybe with another 'Mister'? Who knows. I suppose that's the beauty of life you just don't know what's around the corner or who you might meet. Although I think I speak on behalf of all eight of the Winter Wonderland Posey when I say we definitely did not want to meet this next guy.
As we all passed through the barriers to the platform of St. Pancras Station, exhausted from our day out in the bright lights of London Town, we all noticed Miss Tweedle-Dee being chatted up by a rather intoxicated drunkard and his fat friend. It was clear that whilst Miss Tweedle-Dee knew the twosome, some ex-friends of her brother, she clearly wanted to distance herself. Trying to step in I conversed with them so as to draw their attention away from my bestie. To no avail as when the train pulled into the station we discovered we were going to be train pals. It wasn't even as if we were on the fast one, it was the late night train that stops at every station possible and as the Pisshead started to get louder and more obnoxious I could tell we were in for a very, very long journey home indeed. His rounded sidekick placed himself in a seat opposite me and we proceeded to have a rather grown-up conversation about my Christmas Jumper and his classy can of budget Marks and Spencer Lager. But as Pumbaa mellowed out and sat nicely, Timon just did not shut up. And so, after several loud phone calls including some colourful expletives, and a quiet warning from Miss Tweedle-Dumb and his plump sidekick, the Boozer still persisted in badgering Miss Tweedle-Dee. 'No wonder he was an ex-friends of her brothers' I thought. I could see something stirring in the seats across the carriage from me. She was preparing a rant. As Miss Tweedle-Dumb opened her mouth I knew that this was it, immediately hitting the record button in my head not wanting to miss a moment of this heady burst. Thinking that she was going to erupt into some sort of angry, man-eating, zombie-unicorn I took shelter in my Grazia Magazine and hoped she would make an example of the twat. The entire carriage fell silent and with the eloquent finish off phrase "Now Piss Off!" blurted from Miss Tweedle-Dumb's beautifully linguistic lips Timon and Pumbaa left to go and chat up some girls, explaining how they were security guards at the local airport. From my witnessing tonight, the pair couldn't keep their dignity secure let alone a suitcase belonging to Al-Qaeda.
So as I sink into my pillow tonight there will be only one thing on my mind; And that is that there is only thirty-one more sleeps until the big man comes and empties his sack ... All for me!
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
So as I am sure you can all guess by the title this week I have officially started my countdown to Christmas 2014, although I am pretty sure that started back in September when I began buying presents for everyone. And so as the pennies and pounds start dribbling fast out of my bank account on stocking fillers and the extra bottles of plonk for the big day I am getting increasingly more and more excited. This weekend however, I spent some Q.T with that big bear in my life, Mr. Warehouse but I am pleased to say that whilst we are officially now dating (Eeek, scary) I am wholly devoted to my girls, Miss Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee.
Saturday morning I was roused by something hard digging into my spine. Slowly coming round to the winter sun streaming through my window and the chilliness that lay on the other side of the duvet I realised that I hadn't fallen asleep with my back against Pinocchio's face, it was just my Boyfriend! Oh dear lord its even weird writing let alone saying it! And with a swift burst of energy I was wide awake and heavenly satisfied once more. With both of us out on prior engagements we decided pillow talk was best kept short and sweet so I slung on my Christmas jumper and a brand new pair of super tight skinnies and headed for the kettle.
Monging around for a few hours before we both had to leave, Mr. Warehouse was like a puppy following me around and feeling sorry for himself that we wouldn't be spending the day together. I stood my ground though and whilst I felt bad that I wouldn't be able to celebrate at one of his many family events I had my own family to attend to. Boarding a train I sipped on my iced-coffee from AMT called a 'Froffee' and it is literally to die for, Pret do something similar and again I would easily kill for one! Anyway, as the train pulled up to the station I once called home I saw my friends faces eagerly anticipating my arrival. As I got off and ushered them all to get on and grab a seat I was introduced to some familiar sounding names and a couple of familiar faces. Chatting as we raced down to London I could tell we were all excited for our day out in the big smoke. On the agenda was dinner at TGI Fridays in Leicester Square and then to head on over to Hyde Park for what seems to be now for me an annual trip to Winter Wonderland.
As we stormed into London I felt an almost overwhelming sense of anxiousness take me over. I hadn't been back here since Mr. Cheese and I was worried about how I would feel now being back. I wasn't to worry though as I think the Tweedle's sensed something may be amiss. As we disembarked the train and headed out of St. Pancras Station I felt everyone surround me and whilst I know it sounds stupid I felt supported and happy to have them there. I honestly don't know how I would have felt or reacted on my own or with anyone else for that matter. The fact that I was on the brink of wetting myself probably helped with taking my mind off things but as we walked past my beloved Starbucks I couldn't help but think of the moment back in February when Mr. Cheese and I parted.
Toilet stops done and out the way we headed for the Tubes. Feeling like I was somewhat at home again I strategically guided us through the mixture of tourists and weekend workers to Leicester Square. Looking around and seeing the sights I was once so familiar with we all gazed around in wonder like children as we conversed, waiting for Miss Tweedle-Dumb's other half to arrive in from Berkshire. Once all eight of us were together we headed on up to the spectacular M&M World, right in the heart of the Strip. Even before we walked in you could smell the sweet, creamy chocolatey flavours just wafting through the air. As we elbowed our way through the crowds and looked at overpriced merchandise all of us came to realise that this was a pure novelty and no expense was going to be made by this Octo-gang today! And after a disappointment with TGI's not having a table for eight available we ended up going to Chiquitos instead. Not as good as the independent Mexican Mr. Cheese took me to in Victoria but alright I guess for a quick and easy dinner with the odd game of 'Chinese Whispers'. That was until the restaurant royally fucked up the bill more than twice. In the end I think we had all had enough of the stupid flavoured popcorn and overly priced cocktails and left.
Now was for the real party time! Braving the chilly November air we stepped back out into the city, heading over to the Underground once more, this time ending up at Marble Arch, albeit a rather long-winded route. Dodging some busy traffic speeding across four lanes and singing Christmas songs all the way down the Mall we finally arrived. You could see it from a distance, you always could but somehow it looked better the closer you got. One quick battery change later and I was S-elf-ie ready (see what I did there, aha!) and it wasn't long before we were all posing for funny shot with smiles on our faces and noses pink. Once we had come to terms with the magical light source the Tweedles, Boyfriend and work colleagues all followed straight to the fastest rides we could see. A blizzard thing was happening and with Miss Tweedle-Dumb squealing at the sight of synthetic, sudsy, soap-snow I knew that there was no backing down from this. We were going on that ride.
After taking out a second mortgage to pay for the ride tokens we waited patiently whilst as Swedish Accented European spoke to us explaining about his day and the Winter Wonderland we were enchanted with. Finally it was our turn and being front of the queue meant we had the choice of seats. Bagging ourselves a couple of blue pods, Miss Tweedle-Dumb and I took one pod whilst Miss JoHo and another work colleague of the Tweedles took the other. A quick snap before the ride set off and we all started screaming like children right away. Loving the atmosphere I never wanted it to end as we whizzed around and around, lights blurring as we reached new speeds. Looking over at Miss Tweedle-Dumb I squeaked in happiness and was grateful to be in her company. Faces melting into the burning bulbs I could hardly keep my eyes open as the ride got even faster. Almost at a right angle now I could see nothing but colour. Feeling nauseous I continued to scream, egging the controller on to go even faster. As the ride slowed and came to an end I literally felt exhausted and slightly queasy. I wasn't the only one for the looks on Miss Tweedle-Dumb's face as well as her work friends was equally pale but happy.
One packet of half eaten Churros and several rides later, the Octo-Gang confirmed it was time to go home. Money spent, feet hurting and my patience running thin I just wanted to get back to my bed although habit told me that would be at least another couple of hours away, from door to door. Looking back on the glow of Hyde park as it slipped behind the sparse tree-lined avenues I wondered what next year would hold for me. Would I be returning with my friends again? Maybe with a new set of friends? Maybe with Mr. Warehouse? Maybe with another 'Mister'? Who knows. I suppose that's the beauty of life you just don't know what's around the corner or who you might meet. Although I think I speak on behalf of all eight of the Winter Wonderland Posey when I say we definitely did not want to meet this next guy.
As we all passed through the barriers to the platform of St. Pancras Station, exhausted from our day out in the bright lights of London Town, we all noticed Miss Tweedle-Dee being chatted up by a rather intoxicated drunkard and his fat friend. It was clear that whilst Miss Tweedle-Dee knew the twosome, some ex-friends of her brother, she clearly wanted to distance herself. Trying to step in I conversed with them so as to draw their attention away from my bestie. To no avail as when the train pulled into the station we discovered we were going to be train pals. It wasn't even as if we were on the fast one, it was the late night train that stops at every station possible and as the Pisshead started to get louder and more obnoxious I could tell we were in for a very, very long journey home indeed. His rounded sidekick placed himself in a seat opposite me and we proceeded to have a rather grown-up conversation about my Christmas Jumper and his classy can of budget Marks and Spencer Lager. But as Pumbaa mellowed out and sat nicely, Timon just did not shut up. And so, after several loud phone calls including some colourful expletives, and a quiet warning from Miss Tweedle-Dumb and his plump sidekick, the Boozer still persisted in badgering Miss Tweedle-Dee. 'No wonder he was an ex-friends of her brothers' I thought. I could see something stirring in the seats across the carriage from me. She was preparing a rant. As Miss Tweedle-Dumb opened her mouth I knew that this was it, immediately hitting the record button in my head not wanting to miss a moment of this heady burst. Thinking that she was going to erupt into some sort of angry, man-eating, zombie-unicorn I took shelter in my Grazia Magazine and hoped she would make an example of the twat. The entire carriage fell silent and with the eloquent finish off phrase "Now Piss Off!" blurted from Miss Tweedle-Dumb's beautifully linguistic lips Timon and Pumbaa left to go and chat up some girls, explaining how they were security guards at the local airport. From my witnessing tonight, the pair couldn't keep their dignity secure let alone a suitcase belonging to Al-Qaeda.
So as I sink into my pillow tonight there will be only one thing on my mind; And that is that there is only thirty-one more sleeps until the big man comes and empties his sack ... All for me!
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
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