Shattering the glass ceiling

Hello All, 

And so the moment has finally come. No not the lockdown ending (although I won't lie, that is certainly peaking my mood), no not the fact I am less than a day from my pork scratching advent calendar and no not the fact that I am less than a few days away from seeing my nail lady for my Christmas inspired tallons. No. Now is the moment we discuss moving on ... 

Arriving at work, it suddenly hit me that this was it. There were no second chances and that once it was done there was no turning back. Up until getting out of my car that crisp Tuesday morning last week it hadn't even really seemed real. But now it was very real. The next time I stepped into my car the dynamics would have shifted and all would have been laid bare. I was nervous. Trying to think of the perfect moment was awful. I mean I had some time to think since it had nearly been a fortnight. Nevertheless, I thought I would let management grab a coffee and settle into emails before telling them my news. 

But then started the normal morning rush and before I knew it lunchtime was upon us. After telling a few close colleagues I knew I had to seize the moment and if not now then when. And so, alone in a quiet meeting room I slid the white envelope across the desks (you know COVID-safe and all). Smiling, my manager asked what it was. I explained as best I could without taking up any more of his valuable time although I felt as though I was rambling and not really making much sense. I blathered on about this and that but when it really came down to it, what was there in his hands was quite simply the final nail in the coffin. My resignation. 

I joined the company over four years ago and in that time life had changed immeasurably. I had got Clifford, my big red car after my beloved Vivienne was written off. I have gotten engaged and planned a wedding. I got my best ever freebie, my little pup Frankenstein. I even managed to get myself on the property ladder after years of wondering and dreaming about if it will ever happen. Yes, there had been many a happy time shared amongst my office space and colleagues. However, in recent months and even going back as far as last year, I have not been happy. 

Standing there in a silent meeting room with my manager I explained that it was a decision I had made not lightly, given the situation the team would be left in and considering the pandemic. But I knew in my heart of hearts that now the wheels were in motion I couldn't turn back now. Who knew that walking through those doors all those many moons ago that I would not only acquire the skills for dealing with difficult customers and colleagues but also that I would learn things about myself, my values and my value to others. 

I never expected that I would get a taste for anything more than just a job to pass time and fill up the years before I settled down to have children. I know now that I want more than that for myself and my future. I want to have a job my children can be proud of, doing something that I am good at with people whom I enjoy being around. But there is more to life and I needed to spread my wings and fly off for a new adventure. 

So where am I going and what is next?! Well, following a successful interview I had a phone call one Friday morning before I started work. Switching on the grinding coffee machine in the office kitchen I listened to the voice at the end of the phone tell me the news I had been hoping for. I had bagged the job. But which one? I remembered interviewing for the job, but couldn't find anything on my emails as I desperately scanned through. The lady explained she would send everything over and looked forward to working with me soon. 

The following week I finally received all the finalised paperwork, information and new starter forms. Working normal office hours I will instead be heading in the opposite direction to the other half in the mornings come the new year and into the hustle and bustle of Milton Keynes. Along with the normal benefits package the offices are super easy to get to and is right by the lake, so the "healthy-me" is thinking it would be a great idea to invest in a bike or for a walk or maybe even a run (haha) around the lake maybe two or three times a week. The "fat-me" thinks about all the amazing places I can order food from in the city and how it will be delivered to me by a man on a bike or even better - A robo-delivery-box-a-mijig! 

To say I am excited is putting it softly, but despite my enthusiasm, my heart still aches for my situation and the reasons which have lead me to where I am now. I hope that one day I can talk openly about them, however as most of you know who have been reading along for a while now (can you believe it has been nearly TEN YEARS!) I don't talk about work or employment and keep them and blog very distance. 

And so I suppose this is probably the most honest or open I have ever been about my work-life, but with the next few weeks until Christmas laying ahead of me, things are changing all the time and who knows what curveball or spanner will be thrown into the cogs of my life next ... 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Fear is interest paid on a debt you might not owe

 Evening All, 

And so it has happened. I mean it is not like I knew it wouldn't, it is written into my contract. It is pretty unlikely that things would not have gone back to more of a normality, or whatever this new bullshit is now especially since shops are now open not to mention the restaraunts and pubs as mentioned last week. But as I sat in the hairdressers today on my day off, scrolling through my social media pages, flooded with back to school pictures, the anxiety I felt peaked. Why? Because tomorrow is my first day back in the office.

Week number seventeen and whilst the virus has no end in sight yet, we are being told from media outlets and Government alike to 'Get back to work'. On 17 July, Boris Johnson announced that from 1 August the Government’s advice for England on going to work would be changing and instead of telling people to work from home where possible and if they can to contain and cntrol the virus, employers were given more discretion and in turn asked the country to return to work safely. Workplaces up and down the country started to make decisions about how staff can work in a clean and COVID-secure enviroment. 

"Whatever employers decide, they should consult closely with their employees, and only ask people to return to their place of work if it is safe" said the Prime Minister. However, on 31 July following some local outbreak of the Coronavirus in the Midlands and North West, the postponement of some planned lockdown easing in England had to be halted and ergo the 'Back to work' chants. Since then the Government have updated the 'Working safely during coronavirus' guidance, but with the changes to the relaxation of restrictions and the potential for regional restrictions to be put in place should a spike appear continuing, is it sensible for businesses to consider beinging staff back, even on a part time basis? Everyone will need to have the capability to move quickly from one scenario to another as local lockdowns and quarratining from foreign countries changes by a daily, sometimes hourly even basis. 

This virus is still out there and figures from the BBC released today (Monday 07 September 2020) confirm that whilst the number of new cases of coronavirus is continuing to rise, the death rate is just 3 in the last 24-hour period; A stark cry from the blog post I wrote my first few weeks working from home in late March when the figure was already at over 1,400 which has already been dwarfed by the 41,500 deaths the nation has seen and it is still being added to. Prime Minister Boris Johnson had yet to update us since the 23rd of March with the rolling news and science or the growing number of deaths or what it would mean for Mr.  Warehouse and I as a family and all of the summer fun and activities and parties we would miss out on not only then but looking forward to the rest of the year also; Halloween, my birthday, Christmas, Christmas parties, New Years Eve and not to mention the effing wedding. This being said, however, his strict curb on life in the UK to tackle the spread of COVID-19 Coronavirus has certainly shaken things up 

I spoke right at the beginning of all of this madness stating that whilst the last few weeks in the run-up to the UK's lockdown had been strange, the whole working from home situation had started off feeling odd. Slowly getting better as the days turned to weeks and weeks turned into months I became more and more settled. I had my own little morning routine and even during my lunch half-hour and breaks I would occupy myself with putting the washing on, cleaning or sticking the dishwasher on. I have enjoyed my time working at home all in the knowledge that I could organise a oven clean or some workmen to come round and I would be in. I could order something and know I could open the door to receieve it myself. I could look after the dogs and have cuddles whenever I wanted. It was bliss. 

I, like many workers will be concerned and anxious about even the prospect of being in the workplace. Thankfully I dont have to worry too much about travelling there and back as I don't have to use public transport. But alas it had to come to an end at some point I suppose. Now some of you may already be feeling this way and will want to know that your company or  organisation is retaining the support for physical and mental health as well as its current thinking about flexible and remote working both for now and for the future. Now whilst I accept that we all need to start getting back to our (post-apocolyptic it seems sometimes) new normal, discussions about returning to the workplace, be it a shop, bar or office should be at the heart of any decisions and plans that business makes and every effort should be made to make sure people feel safe and secure in an enviroment they spend more time at than at home, at least pre-COVID. However this is something I feel people aren't talking about not nearly enough. 

The last time I stepped into that office was back in May 2020, before summer, before heatwaves and before any thoughts about postponing the wedding. Even then I only went in to collect a few things from my desk to make it easier to work from home, or WFH as some people are now referring to it. And even before that optional visit it was back in March before lockdown when we were all back, crowding round the doughnuts someone had brought in or queuing for the coffee machine. But I have been assured it is safe with weird heat detection systems, air-cirulation units and socially distanced desks, I am sure it will be, but the communication out is a little sparse for my likling and I cannot, at the moment at least, hold my hand on my heart and say I feel confident and safe returning to work just yet. 

Despite all of this and how tiresome I and many others are finding this lockdown crap, regardless of its "easing", I am glad to just be getting some sort of news and clarity on what the future may look like, even if it is just up until the end of the year. But things are not over and to say that I am scared, anxious, worried, daunted and generally overwhelmed by the whole experiance now as I write to you all less than twelve-hours to go, is an understatement but I know it is for the best and hopefully it wont be so bad ... 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Glimmer of Hope or The Crack of Lightning

Evening Everyone, 

So with work starting to get along in the flat, not by Mr. Warehouse and I pulling our finger out and doing some DIY but by our Landlord, whom whilst slightly slow at getting anything done quickly is now in the process of remodelling the kitchen and bathroom so that we have brand new tiles and flooring, although the job maybe left with much to desire as the bare minimum has been done with what was originally discussed and needed doing. 

I suppose with the constant reminder of how crappy our situation is in terms of not having the capacity to just do it ourselves and get it fixed how we want it and when we want it without having the worry of workmen coming in and out as they please and potentially being left unattended in our home seems to have maybe worked its magic. Either that or someone is teasing me bad. With my mood cloudy and stormy of late and certainly not feeling myself at all, the good new that I have been striving hard for may have potentially paid off. 

Last week whilst at work I had a phone call. As it was near lunchtime I decided to take the call and eat lunch on the go outside in the sunshine. Trying to avoid the falling Blossoms I sat and listened to what the gentlemanly voice said on the other end of the line. He was calling from a very well-known Mortgage Adviser's in England and was explaining about a company that has recently released what was called a no deposit scheme. In the most basic of terms it means that we can borrow 100% of the value for our first home. As it has taken me nearly nine months to save just under £2,000 I was certainly appreciative of the phone call. But surely there would be a few hoops to jump through and something that would catch me out that would take it away from me. It just simply can't be that easy when I have been working and trying so hard to find somewhere or a way of being able to afford to buy. 

The Mortgage Adviser explained as I already knew that products like this did not come onto the market very often and even when they did, they always came with a weird or wonderful loophole meaning that it would not be possible for myself for Mr Warehouse to apply. Questioning it I thought that it might be too good to be true and so took some details and made a date to call him back when I had more time to go through it all. Again I had my questions answered with honesty and integrity from my Mortgage Adviser. Allowing myself for a second to believe that this might be the beginning of my house owning a journey I went through a few preliminary questions in order to get what is now known as a Mortgage In Principle / MIP. Mr Warehouse and I had been applying to probably ten or twelve different Mortgage Adviser's and companies over the last 18-months, so answering questions about our debt and outstanding monies owed was certainly not issue. With our Mortgage In Principle in hand I looked no further and immediately spent the rest of my lunch break calling up estate agents and housing associations looking for any properties that might be within our budget. 

So far Mr Warehouse and I have seen just one property and that was offered to another person due to the fact that they had the premium bond that was slapped on top of the asking price in the bank and ready in cash essentially. As frustrating as it was to let go of a property we could not afford nor have was hard. I think that however in the long run this would have been a better outcome due to the fact that we would not have wanted three bedrooms, nor would we have probably wanted the longer commute or indeed somewhere that we had seen only once and especially with the first property we had seen. As gorgeous and as perfect as it was it was definitely a good choice to not go with the first place we saw. 

Now I am not going to lie and say that it was easy nor in fact that it has been fully confirmed yet that we can buy, but one thing is for certain and that is that there appears to be a silver lining to be otherwise cloud that hangs over me. Over the last couple of weeks I have felt slightly more sunnier and I am solely holding the housing situation as fully responsible for making me smile more. I wouldn't say that I was fully back there and recovered as whilst getting a Mortgage In Principle is a big deal it certainly won't make up for some of the other issues that I have going on in my life at the moment. With me struggling to shift this darkness, I have sought to find some help in the form of a therapist or counselling again.

As frustrating as it is I attempted to go through the normal avenues of the NHS and waiting for doctor's to confirm my mental health and a diagnosis and then a referral and blah blah blah. That was until my workplace stepped in and with several different people's input and help over the last week or two I have been able to hopefully secure myself with a counsellor or a therapist, fingers crossed starting this week or next. I really think that therapy and counselling will help me as it did last time. I just need to focus and concentrate hard on me and not others and hopefully one day I can learn to deal in the cards that I have been dealt. Who knows maybe I'll win ...

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Getting Back on The Bike

Good Evening, 

With myself and a another work colleague wrestling with telephones and battling the emails I to thought myself was it really all worth it. Don't get me wrong I loved the feeling of being under pressure and a good kind of stress. I knew that within a day or two life would be back to normal and the equilibrium would be restored back in the service department of a busy fire and security company. Getting up from my desk, probably the first time in the whole morning, I went in search to get a cup of coffee. Almost on cue my phone rang. It was my Nanny Pumpkin. 

"Hello dear. I just wanted to let you know but your Granddad has gone back into hospital again" she said hastily knowing that she had quite a few other people to call. After more than five years of constant trips to doctors, pharmacies and hospitals myself and the rest of the family were well used to having at these sorts of phone calls just find out that there was no need to worry or stress as he bounced back once more. But there was something different about this time. Something more serious. Something wrong. But with customers queueing on the phones and emails coming out of my ears I have no choice but to return to my desk and see out another day in the office. 

Throughout the afternoon I had more phone calls from Auntie's, Uncle's and even my Dad updating me on his progress or lack of thereof. After work I called around, trying to find out if anyone in the family had been able to contact my brother. It has probably been a good three maybe even four years since we last spoke, and even then it was at a funeral. God knows I didn't want it to be at another one but I needed my brother to know the details for him to make an informed choice like I had about whether he wanted to see my granddad one last time. But on speaking to my mother's sister she assured me that whilst she had fed the message back about just how poorly our grandfather was including details about where abouts he was being looked after in hospital to my brother, it would have appeared my mother was not all that serious about saying goodbye and in turn was preventing my brother from also going, even larking about 'how sick he really was'. 

Later on I discussed my decision about not going to see my grandfather in his final moments with with Mr Warehouse and I seriously worried that I have not made the right decision in going. I can only assume that after the upbringing I have had within the military family background, death is but inevitable along with taxes that is. I pondered on whether my grandfather would want me there but I settled my mind telling myself that he would be so high on drugs he would probably not even know I was there. 'How would I know if I have made that right decision to not see him?' I thought but in reality I knew the answer already and that it would only be clear if and when he was gone. My grandfather and I were never really that close. We chatted whenever I went round to see my Nanny Pumpkin and even shared in a few stories and anecdotes about travelling or dating. He was the person that taught me how to ride a bike all those many moons ago and was the person that taught me a very sure life lesson that would probably make me the person that I am today and that is when you fall off your bike you should always get back up and start riding again for the longer you leave it the worse it becomes when you do. 

Exhausted from a hard few days at work Mr Warehouse and I went to bed early where I quickly fell into a deep sleep. I was only in slumber for a few hours before I was awake once more. On waking I noted about it was still dark and was far from morning. I heard the faint tone of my mobile ringing and trying not to wake the rest of my household I went to go and answer it hoping that it would not wake Mr. Warehouse for he does get ever so grumpy without his beauty sleep. Looking at the time I could see that it was within the hour of 2am. 'Who would be calling at this hour?!' I pondered as I answered the call, expecting it to be a a drunk dial. Answering I heard my dad's voice and he sounded serious. 

"Hi. I am sorry to wake you but I thought you might need to know that your granddad has passed away tonight." My father said. And it was at this point that everything I thought about life and death came into perspective, as crystal clear as a diamond. I don't know for sure exactly what I said although I do remember asking him if he was OK despite very reason we were speaking at such a late hour. A brief conversation as it always ever was with my father he ended the call promising to speak in the morning. I was now shaking. I was freezing cold. Now I was hot. Wait, I'm going to be sick. Nope I need to poop. What the fuck is this. Now I'm cold again but sweating. My hands were clammy as I figure out my way to the bathroom for fear of something unnatural happening to me. Is this shock? Is this fear? 

Sitting on the toilet with my head hovering over the bathtub for at least 30 minutes I became more and more chilly. Head spinning I took a bowl from the kitchen and returned to the safety and warmth of my bed shared with my beloved Mr Warehouse, fast asleep, just as I had left him. But climbing back in bed did not solve my problems. I was pleasantly warm now but the clammy sweaty cold feeling did not leave me. All I could think about was my family and what I may say at the funeral. Would I be asked to say anything? How would we all get to and from the church, service and wake? What would I wear? What would Mr. Warehouse wear? What will the family say about my decision not to see him before he passed? Would the family argue over silly things? All these things that whizzed around my head until I fell back asleep. When I next open my eyes it was morning. My alarm is ringing letting me know that it was time to get up, get ready and get on with the day. As I pulled on some black leggings and a comfy jumper, a staple it seems for my work attire at the moment, Mr. Warehouse awoke, groggy from the Sandman's reign. I told him the news which suddenly seemed to make him perk up and listen. 

"Why are you going in?" Mr. Warehouse asked me, clearly concerned with how I was feeling and possibly worried as was I on how I would handle my workday today, all in the knowledge of what yesterday and the day before brought me. But I had very little choice. If I chose not to go in and stay at home I would just vegetate and watch crap TV which was not really an option when you know that someone else is going to have to pick up the pieces and run an entire five-man service desk team by themselves that was already snowed under and bombarded with constant emails, phone calls and to do lists. And so I went in. Do I regret not going in? Yes probably. Many people and mainly work colleagues told me that I should have probably not gone in that day. But the fact of the matter is that I did and let's be fair in realistic terms what choice did I honestly have. If I had not turned up and for whatever reason my other colleague has not come in also there would be absolutely no one to answer any of the customer complaints, queries or questions. After the week that I have had I could have probably done with not going in. A few close work colleagues and friends of mine had said that family comes first regardless of the job and what I was doing it should have all taken a back burner in order for me to be with my family at what was a difficult time. 

But was it though? Whilst yes what happened in the early hours of Tuesday morning was very sad and upsetting for everyone involved, myself included, unfortunately this was something that we were expecting as a family for some time now. This was far from being out of the blue and a shock to our system. Everyone was apologising and saying sorry. Whilst I did honestly appreciate their condolences, I did consider what I did in the past given the same or similar situation. I too had apologised and said sorry. But I suppose the ironic thing is that I was not sorry at all. I could not take away the pain and sadness as much as they could not take away mine. Alas we are British at the end of the day and it just so happens that we are not that great at talking and dealing with death. I mean you can hardly say "Awwh That Sucks!" when your best friend tells you her Nan died. 

In between my hectic work schedule, barrage of emails and heavy flow of customer calls I was contacted by various members of my friends and family asking me how I was. The truth was that I felt fine. Admittedly. my world was certainly not the same as it was when I went to bed last night and in a small way felt a little emptier than before. The last few days have been difficult and odd to say the least. Work has been exceptionally busy and with a hectic weekend I have barely had a moment to think. Work colleagues, friends and even Mr. Warehouse are telling me that I am taking everything in my stride and dealing with it very well. But I'm just getting on with it. Besides, gotta get back up and on the bike sooner or later?!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

The Night Of Lola The Showgirl!

Hello!

Another long week over and done with I was certainly more than happy that it was finally payday. It felt as though February had been a lot longer of a month than the payday between Christmas and the end of January. Maybe it was the fact that all of my money was ploughed into a savings account ISA in order to desperately try and save for a house in order to move out before Christmas this year. This, coupled with the fact that my weight has now started to slow down after losing so much over Christmas and New Year despite all the personal training sessions and gym visits has all in all left me feeling slightly deflated. With no holiday to look forward to this year and very little planned in the calendar I was certainly struggling with my motivation for losing weight and saving for my first home!

Deciding that I was not going to spend another month not going out and being a complete antisocial recluse, I organised a works night out. Following the works Christmas party and how much fun it was, not to mention just how messy it ended up, I was certain that a good old-fashioned night out to paint the town red! On sending the email out to my colleague I eagerly awaited their response. But nothing came, only a few replies on how some people were not able to make it. There were a few suggestions that involved team activities that were not alcohol related but on trying to obtain numbers no one seemed to care. So it seemed up until last minute it was just me and a couple of the girls going out for a quiet drink and maybe a dance. 

Heading for some pre-drinks round one of the girls house's, gossipping away about music and the likes, trying to decided on what pair of shoes goes with what dress and whether anyone can see our VPL - Visible Panty Line. Frosty air nipping at our legs we were finally in a pub keeping warm and refreshed with some Prosecco or two. Later on the music started to pump and in between scrolling though social media and nattering over the tunes there would be a Selfie or two. Unfortunately none of us out saw the arrogant twat walking towards us like some sort of Andy Warhol. Dressed in an overly tight top that saw the blood supply cut off to his exterior limbs, he waltzed over to our table and failing to introduce himself like a true gent (or to be honest anyone with any ounce of dignity or respect) and practically snatched my Smart phone out of my hand in order to "help" us clearly failing and weak women take a Selfie. 

Five minutes he was still there and despite our efforts to move him along politely we had given up and lost our patience with him and his poxy photography skills fast. Insulting him as only women know how to by emasculating the little toe-rag he eventually got the picture and pissed off, leaving my phone back in my safe hands and with a dozen or so badly taken and blurred images of three women on the Razz. 

Carrying on throughout the night we were joined by some other work colleagues whom were also on a night out with some of their friends, joining together in a drunken stupor I felt like the fifth wheel in all of this. Not wanting to interrupt anyone's conversation and boring of looking at my phone I went off in search of some company. Male was my choice preferably as they were normally more friendly and usually happy to see anyone of the female variety taking an interest, even a Hepher like me! Or so I thought. The first lad I made conversation with was tall with light brown curly hair in what the kids on the street call a "Meet Me At McDonalds" Haircut. Wearing a dusty blue grey jumper and being typically British I mentioned how cold it was and we struck up a chat which eventually lead to him asking for my number. Before I even had a chance to turn around and run back to my friends or tell him I had a boyfriend I was thrust a phone and asked to put in my number. When I handed it back and said I had done it, I was promptly told that this was not true as Mr. Meet-Me-At-McDonalds-Haircut had been watching me the whole time and I had not given my number. "Persistent I'll give him that" I thought as I typed a random number into my phone and saved it under 'Lola' - And yes she was a showgirl! 

Heading off from one public house to the next I found myself in the wallet-sucking auction room and whilst its nice atmosphere, relatively good music and nice cocktails are always welcome in my books, the price you pay for a dribble of Blossom Hill White Zinfandel (my fave) you could walk up the road to the corner shop and buy a whole bottle and still have change. Separated from my work buds I made some new ones with a guy who was sat alone and looking melancholy. Striking up conversation in probably the most intoxicated way possible whereby I thrust my hand out and introduced myself. The gentleman obliged and we got chatting, later on his friends joined and I got talking to some more guys and they asked if I was single. "Wow two lots of guys in one night?! Surely this cant be happening? They must all have that 'Shallow Hal' thing going on!" I pondered. Laughing it off I found my friends and I danced the rest of the night away without many cares in the world apart from having a good time. 

I never knew that I would have been so popular with the lads. I mean granted I did make the first move in terms of walking over for a chat and introducing myself in a proper way as opposed to our All-Muscle-No-Brains "Photographer" earlier in the evening. Being the size I am (UK Size 18/20) I would have thought that men would have turned the other way, ignored me or worse made a joke but in actual fact I think they were just pleased for the attention and the fact that someone was maybe interested in talking to them for a change and not them having to do all the chasing, not that that was what I was after. I kinda feel sorry for lads sometimes as they are damned if they do and damned if they don't in many a moral dilemma, especially when it comes to dating and anything concerned with the opposite sex. 

Now I know some people may criticise me and ask why I did all those things on Friday night when I had a perfectly good-to-me boyfriend sat at home. The thing is that I did not intend to go out with the intention of pulling, cheating or handing out myself like sweeties. I have respect for myself regardless of when I am in or out of a relationship. I know how to conduct myself and am confident in the situations I put myself in. If I wanted to cheat I could and would have done it months if not years ago. But I didn't and don't. Why? Because Mr. Warehouse and I have a strong relationship which means he can go out, chat with other girls, dance with other girls and even mildly flirt with them if he so wishes just as I can and did on Friday night, but the difference between us and other couples is that we trust each other and that each night one or both of us goes out on the piss, we know we're coming home to something much, much more special, meaningful and precious than some twenty-something in "Da Club"!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Still Got It!

Evening, 

So following last week's incident with the house fire I was adamant to get back to some sort of normality before the final  few days before the Christmas rush hit. By this time of the year I wanted to be settled with everything bought and ideally wrapped, sacks and bags ready to go with a plan for the big day on where we were spending it and who with, not to mention to be spending our first morning waking up in our new home for the festive period and maybe even hosting some people over the holidays. But alas, here I was trying to juggle visits from the Landlord in between going to work, calling insurance companies and that's without even making a start on the wrapping or the ninety-odd Christmas Card I have to write this year. But with it all nearly over and done with, insurance settled and the necessities done away with I can finally start to enjoy what I can of this time of year. 

This week was the Christmas party at work and whilst I don't normally talk much about my colleagues and what my day-to-day life is at work or what we do socially I suppose I best touch on my time during what is supposed to be the one night of the year you can really let your hair down. Some people get amorous, Some people get mildly flirty. Some people cop-off with one another. Some have a bust up. The Christmas Party at work has always evoked many a good tale on the Monday morning and alas there was none to tell, and even if there was I wouldn't spill. Saturday morning I woke however with a pounding headache and a serious need to re-hydrate. On asking what time I came home I replied to Mr. Warehouse that I thought it must have been maybe two or half-two in the morning only for him to explain it can't have been since he was up until quarter-to-three in the early hours of Saturday and I was still not back, meaning I must have been out to the lights came.on. Proud to say I still got it. 

Now I have been to many a Christmas Party and works night out, maybe too many to count and certainly too many to remember. There were some of my first encounters of a night on the tiles with work colleagues was probably back in College when it would start on a Thursday lunch time with a hour-long liquid lunch down the pub and then on through Thursday Night, Friday Night, Saturday Night and Sunday night, only to roll up to college on a Monday still drunk or at the very least hangin' out our tree. 

Work life soon progressed after College where I went into my first proper full time job working for a IT and technology company in Northampton. Nights out were sophisticated and started with maybe a brief glass of Rose at lunch down the local Harvester and then home for a quick change before picking everyone up en route to town. Setting our roots down in a cocktail bar one of my colleagues husband's owned (I know, friends in all the right places) we would sip away until the club's beckoned. The night would usually end with Mr. Workaholic coming to collect me or sharing a cab home. Nights out rarely involved Mr. Warehouse in Northampton, we would normally head out of a weekend with his Sister who seemed to know every bouncer in Dunstable and as a result would queue jump and get the best protection, but this was hardly work.  

After moving back home to the 'Shire, and it was then that the work's night out on the razz dried up. Mainly I put this down to just not being able to find a job or company I wanted to work for. There was always a reasoning for the role not working out. Roles were boring. Roles were too stressful. The commute was too far. The public transport was a pain in the arse every day to and from the office. Life was just very unstable, as it had been for the last few years really. That was until I walked through the doors of my last company I worked for. 

Being introduced to more or less everyone that worked there, less than eight-weeks later there I was on a night out. And getting pissed every four-weeks on pay day seemed like a tradition of sorts. It was on this night out, all those many moons ago that Mr. Warehouse and I met. Crushing on me since I joined I had recently split from Mr. Cheese and I think as a ploy to get me to come out some of the guys in the office arranged a night out, to take my mind off it. Betting with the store-man that I would / wouldn't be late I arrived at the designated time, only to be met by a red-haired Mr. CWG and a smartly dressed gentleman in a lilac pinstriped shirt. "Oooh a sales rep" I thought to myself, assuming he would be at least in some money and therefore a good catch in terms of conversation, ethics and morals - Not just a fuck-boy like the rest on Tinder! As more and more faces turned up we headed to a club to dance the night away, but not before some of the girls from the office collared me to ask if I was interested in Mr. CWG or Mr. Warehouse. I played it coy but had no idea that both of them were vying for my attention like some sort of horny peacocks. 

After that night out a girl from the office messaged me and asked if she could pass my number onto Mr. Warehouse and I suppose the rest is history they say. Although when Mr. Warehouse explained that he was not a sales rep and indeed did work in the Warehouse I refused to believe him, until Monday morning came and I met a rather awkward and shy man in the Canteen. From then onwards there was a night at the dogs, quickly followed by someones birthday party, followed by another works night out for one reason or another and then there was the Annual Christmas Party, only to be followed a few months later with an all expenses paid awards ceremony, again drinks included. It was amazing. Like living my college years all over again. Friends soon turned to what I would class as a close knit family and will be forever looked upon as one of the most enjoyable periods of my life. But then things began to change and our little family went out less and less. I was starting to dislike my desk and whilst the people really did keep me from walking on many an occasion I knew it would not be long until the end. 

This time round with my not-so-new-anymore job I feel it is more of a sophisticated affair. Everyone is over the age of twenty-five so have done the whole falling off the curb and bundling into a kebab shop at 2am. Work life nights out now include going on dinner dates, pre-drinks putting the world to rights and talking shite, heading to cocktail bars and paying over the odds for a glass of wine when you could have bought the whole bottle at the shop round the corner. Life is much more mature, but don't get me wrong oh how I do wish I could have a messy night out again with my old colleagues, or maybe with my new ones. A good old sticky night club floor, someone to bum menthol's off in the beer garden and a mediocre argument about how I can walk home as I live so close to town and not needing a cab. Maybe this is something I should initiate. A proper dirty night out! 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Taking One For The Team!

Hallo!

Following the fun and frolics of last weekend at Bovingdon Market, this weekend was a lot more laid back and easy going, despite Mr Warehouse working on Saturday morning that is. Nevertheless I was glad for the relaxed weekend that we had together as come Monday morning I had a big challenge on my hands. 

For one reason or another during the office move from our old establishment, it would have appeared that the holiday board had been mislaid and therefore lead to several key kingpins in the management department being off at the same time, two of which are from my department in service. At first when I learnt that I was going to be heading up the service team for the next week I was nervous, but I soon realized that maybe this is the opportunity to prove my worth and make people realize that I am not just a twenty something looking for a job. I am a serious woman that is looking for a career before settling down to have children. I want to earn my money and gain a higher position within the company and the only way to do so is to prove my value as a team member and also as someone who will be able to lead. 

Today was my first day of the week (obviously being Monday) and whilst I had started on the back foot with another member of the team being off sick I felt that I was able to handle the day well, managing both my engineers and also the customers. I shan't go into great detail about what the issues were throughout the day however there was the normal stuff as well as a few Curve-balls and sticky problems that I eventually resolved, even if it did take me to 6.15pm. 

Did I enjoy being in charge? I think to be honest it is too soon to say, especially since it is only Monday. However, it is safe to say that I am thoroughly enjoying the fact that I am the one that people look to for help. Now I know how big headed that sounds and that I am really blowing my own trumpet, but with the amount of pitfalls that I had today I am almost certain that tomorrow and the following days I can handle anything. A part of me really misses being the only one there and in charge of the whole team. Back when I worked with Mr Warehouse at our last job's, I was the only one in charge and although the division that I was looking after was small, almost overlooked in some instances when compared to the Nationwide company, it was still my baby and I had brought it up from the absolute dirt ground. When I left, the division was blossoming into something seriously worth considering for future development and growth. Over the years that it took me to build up the rapport with customers as well as the engineers and sales people, I earned my respect both internally with work colleagues as well as on a national level with directors and big-wigs alike. 

Whilst I can look back on my time at the company with Rose-tinted-glasses I sometimes need to remind myself that it was far from perfect and take into consideration the fact that things were starting to go downhill and from a management perspective, it was probably for the best that I jumped ship sooner rather than later, only to be forced to find something else. Now don't get me wrong I absolutely adored the people that I worked with and my job I lived for. Some people say that if you love your job you will never work a day in your life and working for my previous company could not have been any closer to the truth. However the money that I got was not great and as an employee I felt undervalued and underpaid for the amount of work I did, with very little thanks along the way. 

Moving to my new company (I say new but it has been almost a year) has certainly been a breath of fresh air and this week can only confirm for me that I am desperate for something more than just a job to pass time until I have a family. I can see myself in years to come running my own team and looking after people beneath me. Maybe customer service or customer relations, maybe a smaller division of the service desk running my own team of engineers. I don't know, but what I do know is that I will ace this week. Women run this country throughout the two world wars and we're probably the only reason why we were able to be so successful, so I am sure that I can hold down the fort for the service team. And despite the initial setbacks and the fact that there was a major hiccup in the holiday-authorisation department, I am kind of grateful for it happening this way as I feel that I have the time to shine and show everyone what I am made of. Being a manager, I don't know yet but I am definitely willing to give it a go, at least for a week anyway ... 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Family Is Not An Important Thing - It Is Everything!

Evening All, 

So after the trauma of last week's trip to and in Basingstoke my bruises have started to heel but even the site of a cold coffee or green and white mermaid makes me sad. Rest in peace Creamy Coffee Caramel Frappucino - Gone but never forgotten and always in my heart (but more often in my belly). I am more than happy to be back home and safe for territory, and after a busy and rather hectic week at work I was more than ready to relax and put my feet up. Alas though that wouldn't happen until Sunday as I had put myself forward in order to host the annual family fun day at work. 

With the whole day being several months in the planning I was certainly looking forward to seeing everybody happy and letting my work colleagues into the secrets that I had been keeping from them for so long. I seriously think but some of my work colleagues must wonder what I actually do on a daily basis, and over the last few months I am surprised that I have been able to manage my normal day-to-day job as well as heading up the organisation for the family fun day, not to mention my duties before being the head of the office courtesies committee and what would have appeared to be chief thermometer watcher and recorder for the air-con wars that still battle long after my duties ceased. 

For weeks upon months now I, along with the board, had been planning what we were going to do on the day including entertainment, food, fun activities for adults and children alike as well as the all important drink. I like organising and in all fairness I was more than happy to plan the whole thing by myself. After a few suggestions we settled on a magician that would cater for both the adults with some close up magic including ice, cards and rings as well as a magic show for kids as the afternoon wound down to an end. There would also be a children's entertainer ready to face paint and balloon model until their little hearts content. A caterer would be brought in and it was decided that a hog roast would be something different but something everyone can enjoy ... Well if you like pork anyway! For anyone not wishing to tuck into Peppa Pig there was a vegetarian option of a filo pastry pie with vegetables which sounded and looked as yummy as the main. Bouncy castles and inflatables were hired in order to keep the kids occupied and a photographer was also hired for the event as well as setting up a photo-booth for people to capture the day in all manner of fancy dress. 

Planning coming to an end I was looking forward to everyone seeing the results of what I and others around me had helped achieve. As ever the week in the my department never seem to get any easier with it getting busier and busier towards the end of the week I was anxious that I would not have enough time to get everything ready in time. Staying late and rallying around the troops for extra help we got done in the end. So as the clock struck twelve (in the afternoon) and everyone started arriving I was over the moon to know that it was all over and done with ... at least for another year! 

Soon the offices and garden surrounding it were filled and as I looked around I noticed that whilst I would never be able to get back what I had at my old company with the friends and tight-knit family feels that I made there, these people that I call my work colleagues are actually just a new family of mine. You have the weird aunties that always give the best advice and pervy uncles that you laugh along with. Good looking cousins with fashion sense to rival Chanel and hot sisters who make Victoria's Secrets blush. Brothers with banter for days and then there is the older and wiser generations that bring a touch of class to everything whilst still managing to be outrageous on the odd occasion. Yes, looking around at my new work family I was certain that I could make this work! I even got a little bit emotional thinking about the fact that I along with my team had managed to pull off a family Fun day that I would hope with rival others before it. 

Even my very own flesh and blood came - Well my auntie, uncle and cousins anyway! With it's been a free event as well as less than half an hour drive from there home, it was a no-brainer to come and support me on such a special day. My first ever event organising. And whilst I wasn't alone in my efforts, I was just glad that my own family could be there to see how well I have done and all the effort that I had put in. I think for one of the first and only times in my entire life I had heard my uncle and my auntie both say that they were proud of me and all the work I had achieved. Unfortunately my sisters from other misters were not available to attend  and instead we're either busy I bet sunning it up in Sunny Beach, Bulgaria as Miss Tweedle-Dee was doing with Momma Tweedle-Dee or getting ready and preparing for a life on another continent as Miss Tweedle-Dumb was with her boyfriend. At least they knew that they couldn't make it, that's all that matters. 

As fast as anything the day flew by with little more than a few hiccups and before I knew it it was time to go home. I think I will miss it you know organising everything and planning for something spectacular. Maybe next year we will get to do it all over again and maybe we can get even more people turning out to celebrate and spend some QT together ... 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Frappuchi-NOOO!

Hiya!

Week done I was certainly glad to be out of the office and ready for a night of partying. It had certainly been one of those weeks, you know the ones, they seemed to drag on forever and never ending stream of customers that have multiple first world problems that you are the sole and only the proprietor of. It felt as though at one point that the week would never end. Thank fuck Friday came round quick enough. 

One of the girls at work was become pregnant, and being due in a few weeks Friday was her last day at work. So we did what any normal company would do and other than throwing her a lovely baby shower, decided to have a nice meal out together to celebrate her leaving. In some circumstances this may have been at the end of the night out maybe even finishing off with some cocktails or at a nice bar around the corner from the restaurant, however, this was not the case. Now by no stretch is the company that I work for anything in comparison to what a night out on the tiles was where Mr Warehouse and I met was, but this weekend certainly showed me exactly how crazy and mad it can all get when we've all had a few drinks. 

Finishing a lovely meal at one of the local restaurants to the town centre, I barely have enough time to swallow the last glass of wine let alone the rest of the bottle that I had left before I was being ushered out of the restaurant ready to hit the town. Enough with the fanciful natures of having a nice dinner between work colleagues it was now time to get shit faced. I shall not go into the details of what happened on Friday night however I think that it is safe to say that we all had a thoroughly good time. 

Waking Saturday morning was difficult and I did in all honesty consider just staying up and waiting to get ready to go to Miss Tweedle-Dee's in order to share the journey down to visit Miss Tweedle-Dumb one last time in her Basingstoke flat. I was certainly feeling fragile by the time I woke up at 8am Saturday morning. I suppose on a plus side I had not been sick so I was a winner already however I didn't come home with my Tolkien subway as normal, only to be found hours later by an angry Mr Warehouse waking me from my slumber with explaining why I was on the toilet and cradling a six-inch half-eaten sandwich. 

Rushing around to get my bag packed, the dog walked and grab a coffee to sober up I headed out to the car and race to Miss Tweedle-Dee's house by 10am. It what certainly cutting it fine however I did get there just as the clock struck ten. Parking up I prayed to the gods that my friend needed to get some petrol and I could jump out the park to get some car snacks. I was hungry as soon as I woke up although with the copious amounts of alcohol I drank the night before, I wanted to make sure that it was definitely hunger and not just a jelly-belly. The 40-minute journey to my left definitely reassured myself that in actual fact I was just in need of food. 

Filling up in more ways than one we were on our way to see our bestie whom I had heard suffered an even worse night than me. Chattering all the way down to Berkshire we had endured the M25 traffic, and now, with less than 10 minutes left in our journey we decided to pull into Fleet Services as we normally do in order to get a Starbucks. Two chocolate-chip cream Frappe's and a coffee caramel Frappuccino later we were on the road again and next stop Miss Tweedle-Dumb. 

Parking the car we grabbed what we needed and headed inside. I was carrying Miss Tweedle-Dee's sandwich, my handbag and my coffee caramel Frappuccino when I approached the infamous steps of doom. Uneven and probably the shortest one being at least a foot high I was cautious in my approach. I thought o myself as I took my first tentative steps towards the stone stairs "I have managed this in the dead of winter, cold and wet and icy. I though I would have fallen either up or down them alread... " OH FUCK!

Loosing my step in beloved buckled oxblood ankle boots, I stumbled and thinking that I had found my footing I must have counteracted it, doing so had caused me to stumble even further. Shouting out to my friend letting her know that I had screwed up, Miss Tweedle-Dee turned around at just the right moment in order to see me fly into the air. Knowing in my head but there is nothing I could do to salvage myself or indeed anything I was carrying, I took off from the first of four very steep and Stone steps. Crash landing and skidding to a stop, I heard the awful sound of my cherished ice cold coffee caramel Frappuccino hitting the floor, splashing for at least a meter in front of me. 

Although in most circumstances I would have made a full recovery and be back on my feet in seconds, even before someone had asked if I was OK this was not the case. With it all happening so quickly I had not a moment to think or indeed plan my comeback. As such I also had no time, or indeed spare hands to grab onto anything and as such had gone flying. You would have thought that the normal response would be drop everything and check that your best friend is OK and that they haven't broken anything or badly injured themselves. But as the pain set in, I realised that this was not the case and whilst the Two aforementioned chocolate-chip cream Frappe's had been neatly placed on the floor beside myself, it was not to check that I was still alive. Oh no, it was for my friend to reach into her bag and pull out her camera, capturing the embarrassing moment for all to see, forcing me to stay put until the picture has been captured. 

Not that of course the neighbours couldn't see that is. As with many parts of the country including my hometown of Houghton Regis, this area of Basingstoke was a council estate. As search the double-storey buildings that overlooked the path leading to Miss Tweedle-Dumb's house. Not being able to see due to the fact that my sunglasses had become entangled in my hair and in front of my face, I could just feel the curtains twitching as people came to see what was happening outside. With a loud thud, the sploshing drink hitting the floor and unrelenting and never-ending fits laughter, I would have come to the window too in order to see what all the commotion was all about, only to realise that it is some silly fuck who has fallen off the ridiculously high steps again. So much were the screams and howls of giggles erupted from Miss Tweedle-Dee that I am surprised Miss Tweedle-Dumb didn't come rushing out to my help. 

After picking myself up off the floor and assessing the damage done I was devastated to learn that there had been a worse casualty in all this. My Starbucks coffee caramel Frappuccino was gone and with nothing left in my little plastic cup I was close to tears. Heading in to tell of the hilarious moment I became superman and show Miss Tweedle-Dumb and her boyfriend the snap I sniffed and hobbled my way to the front room and slouched on the sofa in pain, not just of my body but also of the thirst-quenching loss. 

With the rest of the weekend passing in a haze of fun, family events and even more laughter I know that in time I will heal the bruises on my pins, but wont pass so easily is the day I flew with my Frappe. 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx