Vacation Over: Officially time to return to knowing what day of the week it is!

Evening everyone, 

Crashing back down to earth I would sooner be writing to you all from the beach bar in sunny Marmaris, Orgasm in hand and cocktail menu not too far away than where I am now. But alas our "Up yours COVID" holiday had to come to an end soon and so I am here writing to you from a very dark, blackened Autumnal night with drizzly rain and cold weather that hamper my spirits. Now, where did I leave you all ...

So after booking some excursions and haggling down the price, we had indulged already in a traditional Turkish bath is otherwise known as a Hammam (again I urge you if you have yet to see some uncomfortable bathtime photos you should really head over to my social media, they're a right scream) and also sampled some of the best Turkey had to offer with a boat trip. However what was meant to be our wedding night had been messy, to say the least, not many cocktails consumed but nevertheless woke up with a sore head. 

You see it all started the previous evening when Mr Warehouse and I were trying to enjoy a nice steak dinner with each other at a time when we should have been dining on our wedding breakfast and dancing the night away with friends and family. As I have been doing throughout this holiday I was capturing our holiday and tonight was no different so as we grabbed our banana and strawberry daiquiris and posed for a selfie this strange man came out of nowhere and snatched my phone from out of my hands. Shocked I looked at him in absolute horror and disbelief as he placed the phone on the table and asked us to pose whilst he took a photo on his professional Canon. I was fuming and instantly it had ruined what was meant to be a happy moment in a bitter situation. 

Now it was more bitter than a lime that had been snubbed for an Oscar. The last few days have been wonderful and now this. Mr Warehouse was pissed and asked him what the fuck he was doing and to hand the phone back to me. He didn't. As Mr Warehouse, my knight in vest-tops and jean-shorts (not the hot pant kind don't worry), got up to grab my phone from just the other side of the table our Turkish answer to Annie Leibovitz snatched it back and attempted to take photos on it. This is when my Beau really lost his rag. He demanded that the blog give the phone back or he would knock him to the floor. I knew he meant it, despite being such a reserved character normally he could see it was upsetting me and obviously wanted to make things better. But it was too late, we were flat and done. As he shrugged his shoulders and walked off after handing back my phone I looked at Mr Warehouse. He was ready to walk out. We had full and overflowing frozen cocktails but he was millimetres from throwing in the towel and just walking off and I could see it. He was fuming. Seconds later the bread come out and we had to say something. 

The waiter apologized and explained it was a photographer from the strip that had nothing to do with the restaurant and was not affiliated. We explained the situation to both him and management and they seemed to take it seriously enough when we started we were seconds from walking out. Finishing our meal, however, we were brought a complimentary (although disgustingly toxic) shot of alcohol. Lord knows what the frick was in it, but it tasted like anti-freeze. And that's how we got talking to Mrs & Mrs Brave. 

Leaning over the Scottish wife and wife asked us if we knew what was in the virulent shot. We shook our heads but laughed along as we all swigged in unison. As we got up to leave they asked about what had happened and we gladly explained. Mrs & Mrs Brave explained that if we were looking for a good night out we should head over to "Talk of the Town" as they knew a lot of the locals and some of the lads in the show, one of the only one's still operating in the small tourist hotspot. And so on the authority of good advice from some lesbians, we had just met we headed on over and booked our tickets for the following night. 

And so following the football, Mr Warehouse and I spent the rest of the afternoon doing some more shopping (albeit stumbling around due to the intensity of said Orgasm cocktail) and hunting out fake goods at bargain prices was a breeze, including a Gucci scarf I am in love with for the upcoming season, a YSL glittery pink bag that screams "Clueless" or "Mean Girls" plus some cute Gucci sneakers a la Insta, Nike sliders for some poolside chic and a Gucci beach towel to make sure those Germans know we mean business with our sun loungers. Oh, did I say I liked Gucci? 

Once we had shopped until we dropped, we headed back to the hotel for a few drinks and a chill by the pool before heading out. And tonight didn't seem to be faring much better in the way of drinking as we donned our glad rags for one of the only shows still in town. "Talk of the Town" has been one of the most hilarious shows in Marmaris which dates back to 1996 with a cabaret that guarantees a humorous evening out filled with outrageous antics and laughs all round. And Mrs & Mrs Brave did not disappoint. I had been to one or two drag shows and nights in the past but honestly one of the best nights I think I have had in my entire life. With the lad(ies) belting out hits such as Disney's Frozen; Let It Go and Titanic's OST My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion I was sure that I was being left with no voice tomorrow. Heck, they even put on a performance of Baby Shark halfway through which was a right roaring success, clearly among adults escaping the kids for a week or two. 

Mrs & Mrs Brave seemed to enjoy it too whilst we shared their table and got to know them a bit more. I thought to myself as I sat talking to these married women, maybe fifteen or twenty-years my seniors, how similar they are to myself and my very own lover. Like chalk and cheese one of us was singing our lungs out whilst the other tapped their foot along in appreciation. Both quite short and portly, one with dark short hair and the other long and greying blonde they spoke fondly of their daughter back home and son and his new wife out in Australia whom they seemed to miss deeply. I couldn't help but think that maybe for a night or two, we were the replacement family - And they treated us as such, even inviting us on a specially arranged boat trip with a local friend for a couple of evening's time, just the four of us so as to celebrate a wedding that never happened and I suppose a holiday friendship. My god, is this how it starts! 

Walking off after the show I was high on cocktails and my cheeks hurt from laughing (even if it was interrupted slightly by a brawl between two-lassies and their mom's beefing it out because someone was dancing to close to their table and you know, 2-Metres and all). This was insane. Swapping numbers Mr Warehouse and I made out way back to the hotel, laughing at the fact that one day were eating out at a crumby restaurant with basic steaks, the next were drinking in the company of some amazing Scots-women and in the next couple of days, we could be sharing their chartered Yacht around the small secret islands off Marmaris.  

The alcohol soon wore off though and as we awoke early the following morning, promises of not getting too drunk that night we slipped into our swimming gear for our Jeep Safari. Looking for some sheer adventure during our Marmaris holiday, Mr Warehouse had really run out of steam by the time our adventure awaited in the form of a Marmaris Jeep Safari. The day started off well enough with us shunning the fried breakfast offered by the pitstop and instead opting to hunt out a local corner shop for something fresher, an apple it was decided and a bottle of water. As we continued our journey, exploring the terrain around the countryside among the stunning Bozburun Peninsula and the Marmaris National Park all in military designed jeeps (ours was aqua coloured!) As the convoy of jeeps bombed it down the highway at full throttle we soon reached the well-beaten tracks that we struck at full force! 

As sold to us we were soaked by the time we came to our second stop of the morning, a small family-run resort, seemingly someone's home come pool, come shop, come cafe where we met the most adorable Akita pup, still teething and quite bitey at only a handful of weeks old. It took every ounce of Mr Warehouse and I not to smuggle him into said jeep and take him home with us. Heading to our next stop was Jesus Beach, jam-packing it in so you could walk the famous lake where the water was so shallow you could look like Jesus walking on water (although unfortunately thy hallowed had not been a visitor before) all before whizzing off for a basic yet tasty chicken and pasta salad lunch in a dusty layby hideout seeming for locals and probably home for them too. No rest for the wicked though as we were all frog-marched into the Jeep's for our next and final stop before home to the hotels - A beautiful natural spring pool and waterfalls, Turgut Falls, set deep in the forests outside of İçmeler to the west of Marmaris. 

As Mr Warehouse and I headed back to our plush and less dusty hotel for a shower and freshen up before dinner, we thought it a good idea to decline the invitation from Mrs & Mrs Brave. In the joyousness of the evening, I had instead taken their number and them not mine, therefore meaning unless we reached out we would be nothing more than a tale to tell. One of the reasons I couldn't fathom a private chartered sunset cruise on a Yacht was that it did simply seem too good to be true. We had only just met these people and as red flags go, not knowing their actual surnames is probably one of them. Now I am sure it would have been fine, however I have watched enough serial killer docu-films and read enough crime books on murder and homicide to know that this has "press conference to find our missing family members" all over it. Now I am almost certain as I write this that our Scottish lesbian holiday friends were just looking for some simple company to share their boat trip, celebrating a wedding that should have been and welcoming in a new friendship soley exisisting over social media with the odd Christmas card thrown in. But I just couldn't shake the feeling that Mr Warehouse and I knew nothing of them, barely where they were from or what their lives were like, and being on a boat in the middle of the ocean with no phone signal and no internets connection just screamed Channel 5 documentary with a grizzly end. 

Suffice to say the rest of our holiday was spent lazing by the pool, splashing around, drinking cocktails, reading a good book and of course some last minute spending, haggling (or at least Mr. Warehouse was, I seemingly, had lost my touch and couldn't haggle my way out of a paper bag) on hoodies and handbags we definatly didn't need. Leaving our luxe surroundings and comfortable hotel, our journey back home was not as eventful as the journey we started with however within moments of Mr Warehouse and I grabbed a bite to eat in the airport we had located out friends, brick-shit-house-Stormzy otherwise known now as BSS, Regina George and some other face from the Airport scrap that nearly happened on the way into our holiday. However, a couple of noted faces were missing including the someone impersonating Post Malone and the white portly gentleman resembling something from the Human-Centipede-2. We chose to believe that the threat about "meeting outside the airport" was true and it had all ended in hideous bloodshed and we would hear all about it when we got home, which of course, never actually happened. Landing on a darkened and drizzly Thursday morning at 1am I was ready for bed and excited to be soon at home with our fur babies - Oh and our Fourteen-day self-isolation to begin!!! 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

A Good Way To Waste Time

Afternoon All, 

I know a day early but the Arsenal game is on and better to do it now than try to find good WiFi tomorrow. 

Boarding the plane on a grey and drizzly Wednesday afternoon I was excited to be soon at our 4-star adults-only spa hotel, the most stars I think I have ever stayed in, considering normal holidays are a little more conservative and less flamboyant. Less than ninety-minutes into take-off there was trouble afoot as a girl in her early twenties (the kind that at school would bully you and make you cry for the way your face looked, only to message you a few years later after seeing you grow into an acclaimed MUA and asked for a freebie because "we were friends at school") refused to wear a face covering and started spouting off to customers. Then a Stormzy-esk Black man, built like a brick shit house stood up and proclaimed something I wish I had heard if it wasn't for my ears not popping. Things seemed to quieten down, but not for long as there was another flare-up, again between Regina George and another flyer, an older woman who seemed to disagree with Regina about the fact that her sleeping eye mask was hardly a good face covering. In her defence, however, I must admit that the thick fluff and layers of material would in actual fact be probably a darn sight better than those some others were wearing on board. 

Nevertheless, agreeing to disagree on the scientific evidence behind facemasks and the prevention of spreading Coronavirus was not on Regina's radar and instead, she proceeded to launch herself over the back of her seat and touch the disagreeing women. This was all too much for everyone and instantly there were lots of people who had needed to "use the bathroom" in order to get a better view or had put down their books or paused the movie in order to tune into what was evidently a much better episode of drama than anything by Jilly Cooper. Airhostess' calming things down it put a patch over the gaping wound until another passenger made a complaint about another for not wearing her face covering whilst drinking. This, in turn, turned into a heated debate with the airline staff about what is an acceptable amount of time to not wear a face mask if you are sipping a gin and tonic. The airline did all they can but soon the slanging match started and I really thought that at this rate the plane will be diverted and I will be called tomorrow by The Sun to see if I have any video evidence of "Karens" in action. 

On landing, it didn't get much better as waiting for mine and Mr Warehouse's luggage a fight broke out between brick-shit-house-Stormzy, someone impersonating Post Malone and another would-be rapper and a white portly gentleman resembling something from the Human-Centipede-2. And all because someone pushed in front of someone else to collect their bags. A few words were said (I think one of them had called him a paedo) and before I knew it brick-shit-house-Stormzy had Human-Centipede-2 almost flat out on the floor. I expected something racist to come out, however, Mr Warehouse, who was in the thick of it on the front line assures me nothing of the kind was uttered. Threats to "meet me outside and we will see" were shot, however, Mr Warehouse were tired and despite the extended episode of Easyjet-Oaks, we had a transfer to get to, all in the hope that neither of that episodes characters would be present on our bus. 

Arriving at our hotel it was late, past midnight and we were shattered from the nigh-on four-hour flight, Airport dramas and two-hour transfer. Our hotel was everything we expected and more. The Poseidon Hotel had even switched out our rooms for an upgraded front aspect room with a view of the sea and a balcony to enjoy the view on, albeit when it wasn't pitch black. The air conditioning was much appreciated and the complimentary fruit bowl and bottle of red wine was a sweet touch, even though we were a little confused at first if it was a gimmick in order to get us to spend more money and charge us. 

Waking in the morning, sunlight streaming in through the window I rose and looked out at probably one of the most incredible views I have had from any hotel window since Vegas back in 2015. It was just beautiful with the pointed mountains surrounding the Mediterranean resort town of Marmaris. I could certainly understand why this was labelled as the Turkish Riviera, squinting as the Turquoise Coastline glittered in the morning sunshine. Looking down from our third floor I could see the palm tree-lined sea promenade and pebbly sand beach, perfect for just getting away from it all. Heading out after breakfast Mr Warehouse went to explore, although not before the hotel had a chance to have a "meeting" with us. Basically, it was a tour operator who obviously got some sort of commission from upselling over-priced excursions and day trips to holiday-makers who are still weary from their travels and have not had a chance to explore the local area for other prices yet, ultimately taking advantage and exploiting the unaware traveller(s). 

We booked some excursions and haggled down the price, scouted out the shops and dabbled in the bargains to be had and how much you could haggle a man down by for a pair of sunglasses. Mr Warehouse had made me so proud. After all the years of knowing him and his constant shame in me asking for a discount or using money off codes and vouchers, the many Youtube videos of Asian fake markets and vlog-hagglers had paid off. Walking into the shop and watching from afar it was clear to see he was a man about to do business on his terms. Selecting a pair of sunglasses and eyeing up (pun intended) a second pair the shop keeper unveiled the price; four-hundred Turkish Lira, roughly equivalent to £40.00. Fake Oakley red and black wrap-around sunglasses and some classic RayBan wayfarers. Not worth it. 

Mr Warehouse laughed nervously as he said it was too much and offered half. A bold move I thought to go in at half the cost. The shop keeper seemed to think so and offered a slightly lesser amount, hoping my fiance would crumble. Nope. Sticking to his guns Mr Warehouse proceeded to tell the man what he wanted to pay and not a penny more. Walking out proved a successful ploy as immediately, almost too easy the shop keeper folded and accepted the half-price offer of two-hundred Turkish Lira, roughly equivalent to £20.00. I was like a mum on school photo day, so proud and urging him to do more so I can see the pro at work. 

That afternoon we went back to the hotel and after awaking from our afternoon nap Mr Warehouse had some bad news. The UK government had listed Turkey as a no-go-zone and from Saturday morning at 4am would impose a fourteen-day quarantine rule on anyone returning from the country. Annoyed and frustrated, we had a couple of options, either pack up where we were right now and try to phone the airline and travel company in order to see if we can get an alternative flight back before the cut-off time, or stick it out and suffer the cost implications. We chose the latter, although when faced with flights of £900+ each for a rescheduled flight home less than 24-hours after arriving, there wasn't much of an option. We knew that this may have been a risk when departing however with my work being possible to do from home, it wouldn't be a huge dip in income, and we could always make ends meet with savings if we really needed to. 

And so we stayed. The last few days have been wonderful; A traditional Turkish bath is otherwise known as a Hammam (although anyone who follows me on social media will know the hilarity of the tale behind this experience as we were ambushed by the spa photographer as if that is even a thing for an impromptu photoshoot; noting in the photos posted the absolute terror in my eyes as he poked his head around the corner just as mere bubbles hide our modesty). Yesterday on our would-be wedding day (the whole reason we took this damned holiday) we also sampled some of the best Turkey has to offer with an excursion we just couldn't miss out on all aboard a boat. 

I awoke that morning and for a short while forgot what the date was and what the day should have meant. I should have been donning a white dress and marrying the man of my life but instead it was going to be very different for all sorts of reasons, but now the date had arrived there was a mixture of emotions bubbling away. I was sad for our day not being when it was meant to and upset I did not wake up with my girls and get ready together, friends and family dropping by to wish me well and tell me to "hurry the fuck up". I was disappointed I couldn't have danced the night away with loved ones and frustrated I still have yet to start the rest of my life as Mrs Barlow. But the day was not all lost as we boarded our vessel for a beautiful island tour boat trip. 

Setting sail from Marmaris harbour, we stopped for a swim break off the coast of the rocky mountain islands Mr Warehouse and I had seen from our hotel balcony. I was brave enough to take a dip, but not as brave as some people, diving in from the side of our ship. A while later we arrived just off Dalyan where lunch was served as a fish or chicken dinner and once finished we were transferred to small wooden boats to cruise on the seas surrounding the infamous Turtle Beach where three different types of turtle come to lay their eggs and where the salty seas meet the fresh waters of the African Queen, a reed-filled riverbank giving the feels of Floridian swaps and marshlands similar to that of the Everglades, I imagine. 

Continuing our journey we sailed past the Temple Tombs carved into the mountainside and said to house the dead of rich and famous of centuries gone by and their Egyptian slaves and into Dalyan, a town on the Dalyan River, just inland from Turkey's southwest coast. Sailing further on to the northwest on the Dalyan shore of Lake Köyceğiz is the village of Sultaniye, known for its thermal mud baths. There Mr Warehouse threw caution (and some mud) into the wind and immersed ourselves in the therapeutic natural clay masks and thermal springs before heading back to the ship for home and a night out on the tiles. 

So far our holiday has been everything we wanted and more. Granted I will need to work from home once back and I might regret coming in a few months time if bills are tight because of our frivolous trip but sitting here having my fourth Orgasm (not actual, obviously I'm in public) in a row doesn't feel like a bad way to spend some time with my future husband. Now where's that cocktail menu again ... 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Hand(luggage), Face(mask), Space(-d out sun loungers)

Heyy Heyy, 

Following on from last weeks McDonalds brekkies, Bottomless brunches and heavenly crepes, I have not exactly been going in the right direction when it comes to my newly started Slimming World Journey. I get that everyone has put on a pound (or twelve) during the whole Lockdown thing, however I think if anything, and maybe it is the age thing talking now - I just dont give a fuck. I enjoyed last weekend so much so I think I have realised that yes, whilst I, like most people, need to eat more fruit and veggies and maybe move a bit more, I enjoy food and I dont want to be sat in a room of people every Tuesday evening clapping for Brenda or someone else who lost half a pound. I wanna be boosting Brenda up and telling her I fricken love those sweatpants she is rocking or how she has her hair today. I want to be around empowering women and not making them feel bad that they fell off the wagon a few days in a week and had a damned KitKat. And so I think when I return from my holiday (less than 48-hours to go and counting) I will rennounce all Slimming World visits only goign in for the bare minimum whilst I see out my remaining week's I have pre-paid for, checking in on my ever fluctuating weightloss. 

And sowith less than eight hours of work to go, the countdown is well and truely on. As I had explained last week, my finaly year of my twenties I want to do stuff, see stuff, visit places and just tell Corona to do one. COVID-19 really has fucked everything - Weddings, Work/Life balance, Halloween, Career, Parties and social activities, even holidays - Or so I thought before I got the most incredble present I think anyone could get on their birthday - A FUCKING HOLIDAY! This time next week ladies and gentlemen get ready to be green with envy as I will be 2,393 miles away from here in Marmaris, Turkey. 

Flying out Wednesday, Mr Warehouse and I will be leaving our pups behind to play with their sister (Frankenstien's Pup-Sister) and Momma Warehouse AKA 'Grandma' for a whole week with friends and family dropping by throughout the time I am sure. Jetting off to the Mediterranean resort town along the Turkish Riviera, also known as the Turquoise Coast, Marmaris is a dreamy location with pebbly beaches and long seafront promenades, perfect for just getting away from it all. The seaside, tourist hotspot is known for its lively nightlife on Bar Street which is home to open-air clubs and music venues, however from some of the YouTube videos and vlogs we have watched over the last fortnight or so, most of them seem closed. Marmaris sits in a valley between pine-forested mountains and clear waters, which are popular sailing and diving destinations, something Mr Warehouse and I are hopihn we might be able to find an excursion or two.

Our hotel is to die for as well. Situated right on the beachfront sea lapping up against your toes, The Poseidon Hotel offers a private beach area with a jetty and free sun loungers, parasols and cabanas beds. The hotel has both an indoor and outdoor pool as well as a Turkish bath, sauna and a fitness centre. All room are beautifully carpeted throughout and what looks like marbled stone private bathrooms with a hairdryers, free toiletries and everything else you could possibly need for your stay. Air conditioning as an absoloute must for Mr Warehouse after several dodgey budget hotels with little or none and I am sure that the TV and minibar will be put to good use also. 

With the All Inclusive menu there will be plenty to pick from I am sure, or maybe something à la carte where Mr Warehouse and I can enjoy selected dishes from Turkish and international cuisines. If we fancy it Marmaris city centre is less than a two-mile walk from the hotel with plenty more options for food and nightlife. According to Booking.com, "according to independent reviews, this is guests' favourite part of Marmaris and Couples particularly like the location rating it 8.9 for a two-person trip." so I am positive we will have a good time and with Free WiFi available throughout the hotel I am sure you will all be getting sick and tired of my constant 'Gramming by Thursday Morning. 

Oh and did I mention - Its adults only! No screaming Wayne's around poolside wanting their fifth ice-cream in a row. No crying Abigail because she cant use the Hammam mud chambers. No silly slides or water fountains (although not going to lie, probs gonna miss that myself). So grab your overpried straw sun hat from Accessorize and the Haviana's you bagged from your bestie when she was having a clear out and let get our holiday on!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Mini-Moon for the new Bride & Groom!

Heyy, 

With the last few months of Christmas, New Years and the last few bits of Wedding planning one of the last few big things we needed to book and research was our first few nights as a married couple. Some newlyweds now have nicknamed this the Mini-Moon, a short break or weekend away following getting hitched. 

Now whilst I spoke of last week's blog the beautiful Cornish setting and surroundings of the Retallack Resort & Spa with its bars, free WiFi and beautiful beaches nearby it would have been perfect if not for the four-odd hour journey. And so with this in mind, we took a look closer to home and in particular the Wyboston Lakes Spa and Golf Resort Complex. We are staying at one of three hotels on the 350-acre resort called The Waterfront Hotel Spa & Golf. Located just off the A1 and just a twenty-minute journey by car from our venue at Stagsden, the hotel offers free Wi-Fi, good food, an 18-hole golf course and driving range as well as plentiful leisure facilities, an incredible spa and ample free parking. 

I am sure that with its delightful lakeside setting and modern but spacious bedrooms we are sure to relax in style. All rooms feature as standard en suite bathrooms and a flat-screen TV's with good food prepared by expert chefs available at a tap of a finger using the in-room iPad and full use of a gym and small indoor swimming pool. The room itself we have chosen to upgrade because you know why not - It's our wedding night / Mini-Moon. Junior Suites at The Waterfront are not just luxurious hotel rooms with super king-size beds but host lavish Hungarian down-topped mattresses and choice of accompanying pillows. These rooms are larger than both Superior and Deluxe Rooms the hotel offers but appointed in the same pastel colours and styling with the addition of some extra storage. Sitting rooms/areas and work stations are included as well as a comfortable armchair, footstool, coffee table and sofa which can fold out into an extra double bed. Now that really is the kind of place I want to wake up on my first morning as a Mrs.

The Y Spa is really why I wanted to book though as after being there a couple of times to visit I have never had the opportunity of indulging in the outdoor hydrotherapy pool, sauna, steam rooms, mist showers, ice rooms, relaxing areas and water beds. The website states that "Y Spa has created a fabulous space which will stimulate all of the senses. Expansive areas filled with natural light and a warm ambient atmosphere. The area incorporates large picture windows to the terrace, bringing the outside in, whatever the weather. This little bit of luxury allows you to use hot and cold experiences as therapy, the benefits of which are far-reaching and include: improved respiration and circulation, relief of rheumatic aches, pains and stiff joints as well as improvements to skin texture with benefits to those suffering from eczema or skin conditions. Combining heat followed by cold boosts the body's natural defences, shifting your entire metabolism up a gear."

The Steam Room. A 42-degrees and with 100% humidity, the combination of high humidity and radiant heat gently invigorates the skin, respiratory and circulation system, all within a magical cavern, shrouded in iridescent mosaics and colour changing mood lighting to purify and relax both body and mind. Or maybe a Sauna would be more your cup of tea? With the slightly more warming, 55-degrees and humid the "soft" sauna has a lower temperature than Y Spa's traditional outdoor sauna. The humidity provides a gentler heat and softer experience to the traditional sauna allowing to relax and to recharge your batteries as well as a skin detox. Improving circulation and allowing muscles to relax, providing a peaceful space away from everyday life. 

Not hot enough? Cranking it up a gear to the 85-degrees (or hotter) and low humidity the beautiful Kelo wood sauna, made with one-hundred-year-old logs gives the hottest of the  Y Spa experiences. Not for the faint-hearted, its location outdoors in the Spa Garden can be accessed via the Hydrotherapy pool or the Garden terrace and is the perfect route to pure relaxation post-exercise or for weight loss and detoxification.

Hydrotherapy has been around for thousands of years and in its simplest form can be described as therapy through water - Obviously. However, being much warmer than a swimming pool, Y Spa's Hydrotherapy Pool is a place to relax and let the bubbling waters still your body. Used to treat common ailments such as muscle cramps, circulatory diseases, arthritis, osteoarthritis, back pain, balance, and stress-related disorders; hydrotherapy is a great way to spend some time, relaxing on the bubble bed or massage tension away using the body jets and revel in the wonders of nature enjoying the outdoor Hydrotherapy Pool all year round in the snow or the rain too.

On top of all of those, Y Spa's experience showers are used as a breather between treatment rooms. "The Chill Zone" allows guests to cool off either with a gentle blowing mist or invigorating tropical showers, raining from above like a monsoon. If you're brave enough maybe a visit to the ice wall in order to constrict blood vessels, increase oxygen flow and stimulating circulation. The Hotel's Spa also boasts the "Time Out Area" is perfect for unwinding, lounging and sitting back to read a good book, or two, all in the comfort of waterbeds, warmed perfectly to your body temperature. The Relaxation rooms with ergonomic loungers and cosy fireplaces it's the perfect place to curl up or unwind for a schnooze. 

With eight months to the day as I write to you now, I cannot wait to stay at this beautiful resort and with the added benefit that my Husband will be right there alongside me!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Boiling Blood and Melting Hearts!

Heyy, 

Booking some much needed time away from my desk and off work was certainly what the doctor ordered. With the last few months being a bit of a whirlwind in terms of emotions and life events and as suggested by several people including Miss Hackney and Miss Sugarcoat, I decided a couple of days off for rest and recuperation to relax has been beneficial. 

I did have a few things planned and on Wednesday I booked to get my hair done, but alas a relaxing afternoon in the hairdressers chair was postponed due to the fact of my hairdresser being poorly. As frustrating as that was it was annoying even more so as it was slap bang in the middle of the day at two in the afternoon and after it was cancelled with only half an hour to spare or so there was not much else I could do with my day. I suppose if I was a little bit more organised with my time then I could have found someone that would be able to do me a new 'do however I decided not to and just rebooked for a couple of weeks time. Here's hoping that none of my colleagues have the 7th of August off fingers crossed. 

Along with a nice long lye-in and some more crap daytime TV, Thursday started with going to my usual counselling sessions and therapy, although this week was the first of the NHS Treatments. The meeting itself was quite matter-of-fact and went through the different kinds of therapies the government in the UK now offers. Everything from group therapy sessions to CBT as well as one-to-one counselling and therapy however the waiting list is extremely long. It was suggested that the group therapy sessions would be better for myself although the two hour-long sessions either in the morning or an afternoon on a weekday may not be possible with my work schedule at the moment. I also question as to whether I would reap the benefits with up to ten people in a group. I suppose that it is just one of those things I will have to try and see if it works or not, and on the plus side I get to hear about other people's sob stories which will ultimately make me feel better about myself as harsh as that sounds. 

In the afternoon I had a doctor's appointment to discuss my ongoing medication and going forward with treating my depression. As expected the doctor has suggested that I continue with my medication at least for another month or so with a a check up in a month or so. Whilst the medicine I am on has finally stopped making me feel queasy and nauseous and regardless of how I feel much better and more back to normal, I know that coupled with counselling and therapy I will need to continue my treatment with pills, at least for the short-term. 

As Friday soon rolled around, I was really looking forward mine and Mr Warehouse's to a spa day in London, courtesy in part to Nanny Pumpkin's Christmas present to us both. After using the voucher back in April when Mr. Warehouse and I went for our aweful spa day and afternoon tea (which was OK actually) hosted by the Loch-Stress Monster, I complained and the company who sold us the voucher agreed to offer a return visit to a selected spa of our choice. Booking it in last week, Mr Warehouse and I were excited to be spending some quality time together with what we expected to be a gorgeous fruit platter, welcome drinks and some relaxing treatments. Arriving at the spa in London's busy Soho District it was a bit of a palaver to try and find parking and get the tubes through to where we needed to be. By the time we arrived it was only moments before our first treatments which meant that we did not have enough time to explore the spa or indulge in some of the areas as listed on the website such as the ice cave, sauna, steam room, pool or relaxation area. In fact we didn't even have enough time to get anything to eat beforehand and since it was nearly lunchtime we were both famished. But it didn't matter too much since we had a lovely fruit platter and welcome drinks to look forward to ... Right?

Wrong! As we approached the spa reception in order to check in for our treatments, dressed only in our swimwear and flip-flops, my thoughts drifted to what sort of delights would be on our fruit platter and welcome drinks. A young woman in her mid-twenties checked us in and took our voucher code from us. On asking politely for our fruit platter and welcome drinks to be brought to us in the relaxation area, I was promptly told that the fruit platter and welcome drinks package were no longer offered and had been this way for about a year or so. This baffled me slightly as I had only booked spa day a week ago and already had a few email confirmations from another lady on site that clarified our treatments times as well as that elusive fruit platter and welcome drink. Seemingly not bothered at all the young girl called through to the top reception and spoke to the lady I had been emailing to clarify on the fruit platter and welcome drinks we were advertised when booking. In between the young girl holding the phone away from her ear and then putting it back again I thought about how I calling the customer service in this establishment is especially for Central London and what from the advertising of products and treatments did not seem to be a cheap place to spend your time. As the spa receptionist ended her phone call with the lady one floor up she explained again how the package was no longer offered and therefore would not be something if they would be able to accommodate despite priding itself on being in a central Westminster location with a prestigious postcode and a Tesco's only a moments walk away with all the fruit you could ever think of being on a fruit platter. I am almost certain that if even that was a stretch, that maybe a cup of tea or coffee would have sufficed but even this seemed to be a step too far and something that was not offered to us despite explaining the fact that we had not eaten anything in anticipation for the delicious package. 

Thus so far our spa day was shaping up to be a bit of a non-starter and considering this was a effort by the voucher company to restore faith in their products and services it certainly was not going well. Up until that moment, no one had showed us around the spa or what facilities they had so I asked if this would be possible. The young girl just simply sat behind her reception desk and added to the already lacking customer service by pointing to the different areas that we would be able to use. Walking around ourselves, Mr Warehouse and I explored the areas including the sauna, steam room, showers and relaxation area. I was extremely disappointed to learn that along with the fruit platter and welcome drinks the ice cave did not exist. There was little enjoyment to be found in the pool as there were several swimming lessons / classes going on and the rest of the pool dedicated to medium or fast swimmer lanes, something of which myself and Mr Warehouse were not told at the time of booking our spa day or indeed when we arrived. 

Frustrated and disappointed entirely we headed back to the relaxation area in order to try and unwind before our treatments. Whilst the spa was extremely clean and well kept there was a lack of facilities that were advertised on the website had been a major let down and combined with the fact that the relaxation area was centred right by the reception desk and the changing facilities made for a less than relaxing time with the constant noise of dryers, showers which wasn't ideal. Now I understand that a spa or similar type environments will need changing facilities, dryers and showers which generate noise, the presence of a cleaner hoovering and what can only be described as workmen either drilling or hammering something in an area down the corridor only disrupted us further. 

Even as Mr Warehouse and I attempted to get some peace and quiet, the clicking of the receptionist mouse could still be heard loud and clear, something which only reminded me of my own daily grind sitting behind a desk which hindered my ability to try and relax. I don't know, maybe it is just me but I simply cannot understand why you would have a "relaxation" area located somewhere that can still be polluted with noises from the daily coming and goings of what can only at this point be described more as a leisure centre than a spa facility. 

Quite frankly I just wanted to get changed and leave as what had planned to be a relaxing and enjoyable day together spending some quality time was certainly not what it cracked up to be. As I was called in for my back, neck and shoulder massage plus a full body exfoliation, I wasn't expecting much although I must admit that the treatments themselves were wonderful and helped to take my mind off of things - That was until I came out of the treatment room only to find out that my 55 minute combination of treatments had actually only taken less than 40 minutes, again leaving me deflated and upset with the level of service I have received. Mr Warehouse however did say that his treatments were lovely and that the lady had even taking extra care due to Mr warehouses skin condition, also gave him advice about his pedicure treatment and elaborating on how he can keep his feet in the best possible condition with similar and more regular treatments. 

As frustrating and disappointing as our spa day was, it was meant to be a happy time where we could relax and recuperate together, getting excited about finally getting a home of our own. I think that Mr Warehouse would join me in saying that the last few months life has been a poisonous melting pot of my mental health issues, Mr. Warehouse's own health worries mixed together with a good helping of work dilemmas, family problems and the stress of buying a house. 

Leaving thus far almost immediately after Mr Warehouse had finished his treatments, we headed to Battersea Dogs and Cats Home in order to say hello to some of the unfortunate friends of the charity. Wandering around and looking at all the doggies in their little cages made us so sad that we just wanted to take all of them home. I was quite surprised to see a good few greyhounds as I expected there to be more staffies and bull-type breed dogs. It turns out after talking to members of staff working there that the greyhounds had outlived their Racing days and therefore were cast aside due to no longer being able to compete. There were also a couple of smaller dogs which took my fancy including a German Spitz called Teddy, a cute Patterdale Jack Russell who was rather barky and a gorgeous Alaskan Malamute called Damien. Although sadly after having a conversation with one of the adoption ladies, we were told that the likelihood of getting a puppy would be slim to none as we work during the day and would need to be home in order to take care of it. I think for me at least, the fact that my puppy or new friend would be neutered is a bit of a sore subject as I would want a boy dog that I may or may not want to stud from in the future. I think that it is for this reason that I would probably more so get a dog from a registered breeder rather than a re-homing centre such as Battersea. Obviously with a few weeks left to go before we hopefully (fingers crossed) move house, getting a puppy or even a adult dog is certainly far from my priority list.

Suffice to say that I have enjoyed the time away from my desk and the constant ringing telephone with customers, however with that being said I am definitely glad to be back to work today and into the normal swing of things and a routine I am familiar with. That been said I better get a shifty on as I am due to be meeting Miss Tweedle-Dee for some sushi and a catch-up in an hour - No rest for the wicked 'eh?!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Difficult Roads Often Lead To Beautiful Destinations

Suup, 

I never thought that I would have festival blues like I did at Reading Festival back in 2014, oh boy do I have a big come down from the glitter and frolics of a festival atmosphere. Truth be told I didn't think that I would have enjoyed myself or looked forward to the Bedford River Festival as much as I did. Maybe it was the drib's and drabs of family and friends throughout the weekends festivities that made it as good as it was, or maybe it was just simply down to the fact that I felt much better than I have done in the last few months. I suppose that the reality is that next time the Bedford River Festival comes around we will be living in our new home and who knows what life might be like then. although I am sure that there will still be a place for some glitter and denim shorts to enjoy the drumming music, incredible smelling food and host of activities and things to do and see. 

With the last few months being a bit of a whirlwind in terms of emotions and life events, I decided a couple of weeks ago that I would book a few days off at the end of the month after payday in order to have a little bit of me time for rest and recuperation. Suggested by several of my friends including Miss Hackney and Miss Sugarcoat who I have met up with a few times over the last couple of weeks, I think a few days to relax and take time for myself will be beneficial and can only do me some good. I have a few things planned such as some nice lye-in's and watching telly. On Wednesday I will be getting my hair done which maybe doesn't seem like such a big deal but for me a relaxing afternoon in the hairdressers chair is just what I need. Maybe afterwards I might take a trip over to one of the retail outlets a few miles out of town in order for some retail therapy and a treat or two.

Thursday's plans will consist of going to my usual counselling sessions and therapy, however this week will be the first of the NHS Treatments. In the afternoon I also have a doctor's appointment in order to discuss my ongoing medication and going forward with my diagnosis. Whilst the medicine I am on has finally stopped making me feel queasy and nauseous, I haven't stopped taking them as I know that this is something I need to continue in order to build up it's effect, regardless of how I feel much better and more back to normal. I know that coupled with counselling and therapy I will get better it will just maybe take a little bit longer. 

Friday is what I am really looking forward to as I will be accompanying Mr Warehouse to a spa in London. Courtesy in part to Nanny Pumpkin's Christmas present to Mr Warehouse and I we will be enjoying a gorgeous fruit platter as well as some relaxing treatments. I think just simply having some time just for us will be nice as I think life just takes over and before you know it it has been weeks since you have spent time with each other. 

I know after spending Sunday afternoon in the sunshine with two of my favourite people, Nanny Pumpkin and Mr Warehouse, I realise the heartbreaking reality that whilst my Grandma is doing her own thing and thoroughly enjoying life skipping off here, there and everywhere, I know in reality by the amount of times my grandfather was mentioned that she does miss him. Listening to Miss Hackney and Miss Sugarcoat their own grandparents and how their lives have been affected since one of them had passed away made me want to spend time, and quality time at that with Mr Warehouse whilst we have the chance to do so before mortgages and family life takes over. 

This is a happy time where we should be excited about finally getting a home of our own and looking forward to putting our own stamp on the place, although I think Mr Warehouse would agree with me when we both say that life has not been the easiest for us at the moment. It has been a poisonous melting pot of complicated issues including my mental health, Mr. Warehouse's skin condition and his own health worries all mixed together with a good helping of work issues and family problems, sprinkled with the stress of buying a house and preparing to move home. When the Devil on my shoulder tells me that it is going to be very expensive and makes me question as to whether Mr Warehouse and I can afford it, I must remember all of the other times that I thought or wondered how I would ever afford what I wanted in life. I am sure that I will look back a year from now and wonder as to what exactly I spent my money on. 

It terrifies me to think that I will have to depend on someone else both financially and in the general upkeep and running of the house in Mr Warehouse. To say that things have been tense or highly strung has been a understatement and I would say Mr Warehouse and I have argued more than we have ever in the last few months than we ever have in the last three and a half years we have been dating. But for all the snippy comments or playful bickering that happens between us I cannot fault Mr Warehouse for his support and love over the last few months, holding me up high when I was down in my lowest points and making me feel so loved and wanted it's unreal. I don't think that there is literally anything that his arms couldn't cuddle away and I know that whatever life throws at us I will be able to deal with it just as long as I have him by my side, wiping away the tears and making things better for as long as we have ... 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Bed, Bath and Beyond ...

Evening!

Now dark and getting colder as we got deeper and deeper into the countryside of the Mendip Hills I was certainly ready to relax a little after being stuck in the driving seat for the last four-hours. The property itself was slightly difficult to find, especially in the blackness of the now early winters eve, but once found was easily located throughout our stay. On arrival we pulled over and called our host who promptly came running down the dirt track just as we pulled in. As lovely as ever, she told us to follow her young son down on the bicycle to where we would call home for the next few days. Trundling the country lanes to The Cabin, the owners had already lit the real log burning fire so on entering the humble abode it was toasty warm in comparison to the wet and windy chill that threatened our trip. 

The Cabin itself compromised of a simple hallway and corridor with doors leading to the other rooms. A small "Snug" with a small sofa bed, poof / beanbag and a wall map was classed as the second bedroom and next door a large double bedroom with full length mirrored wardrobes and plenty of space for a cot or a chair at one end. Across the way from the "Snug" was the bathroom, equipped with a large shower and plenty of storage options as well as the normal bathroom items. Other end of the hallway was the kitchen come diner come lounge area where the stove was burning away nicely and the kettle was on. Everything was cosy and well equipped especially the kitchen. There was milk waiting in the fridge for us on arrival which was especially appreciated since we had forgotten this on our travels down. Although the sofa and arm chair were a tad on the small side and slightly dated we could not begrudge the owners just on this. Within moments of leaving I had suggested to Mr. Warehouse that had a hot tub been present the owners could well have charged double the £180-odd it was to stay there and would maybe have a few more bookings. It would certainly be an additional benefit and luxury I would have been delighted with. 

Settling in Mr. Warehouse and I unpacked the car and made our way to bed after long days at work and a tiresome drive of a Wednesday evening. Waking on the following morning though was a certainly a lovely experience. With the aches and pains setting in from my personal training session the day before I was glad that I awoke to hearing Mr. Warehouse and Pup playing chase outside in the paddock. Listening to them run up the wooden steps to the front door I awaited the thud of paws and feet into the bedroom for my favourite people to bundle me on our new bed. 

On finishing breakfast we bid farewell to our pooch as we headed out for our spa day in Bath. Now this is probably one of the most pricey things I have bought or paid for in a while and for £150.00 I really did hope that our afternoon at the UK's only Thermal spa - Thermae Spa Bath. What did I get for that sort of money you ask? Well firstly it was a half early Christmas present and half anniversary present for myself and also Mr. Warehouse too so the seventy-five quid price tag per person didn't seem too harsh on the wallet, not when you consider the four-floors of relaxation and renew including a sauna, two steam rooms, solarium, ice chamber, rain showers, Minerva pool, jacuzzi's, whirlpools and the pièce de résistance  A roof top heated and lit pool overlooking the city and cathedral. Beautiful as that was I was also looking forward to the Thermae Treat spa package including a Reviver Back Massage, a Facial and a Head massage, To be fair, for the price that I paid (well for the price that I put on my credit card ... ) I think it was worth it. I loved the smell of the place and I can still catch a scent in my makeup brushes even this morning. Would I go again?! Definitely! However I would of course liked to have made it a full day of relaxing and more treatments to spread throughout the day, broken up with trips to the sauna and dips in the pools. 

A walk through the Christmas Markets made me more happier at the content than that of York's disappointment last year. There was so much more, stalls and huts everywhere and down every nook or cranny there was even more. And after a relaxing Friday at The Cabin taking the pooch for a long woodland walk and cuddling up on the sofa for a session of crap telly and food bought from a local butchers in the town of Wells, Mr. Warehouse and I had returned to the Christmas Markets of Bath City Center in order to spend out our last full day in style. Mulled Wine, Warmed Cider, samples aplenty and tasty things everywhere I was certainly super impressed with the amount of produce and products on offer from the huts and stalls. So much more than any other UK based Christmas Market I had visited before, be it York, Birmingham, London or more local. As the (fake) snow fell from the night sky I was certainly disappointed to be leaving as despite ticking the Roman Baths off the tourist hot-spots list, there was still a fair amount of things I wanted to see and do including the Pulteney Bridge in the daytime (walked along it at night, although Mr. Warehouse was tired and becoming increasingly hangry by the moment). Taking long walks with my Beau and Puppy in the Jane Austen inspiring Prior Parks and gardens, Cheddar Gorge and Wookey Hole (although mainly for the cheese I must admit). All of this and more including trips to nearby Bristol, Weston-Super-Mare and other towns and villages in turn means Mr. Warehouse and I will just have to return. I suppose we best check out how that Thermae Spa is doing as well, you know, just to check. But I cant get holiday blues just yet since in less than seventy-two hours I will be in the wonderful winter wonderland of Prague. Here's hoping its not too chilly ... 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx