A Week In Paradise With The Tweedles

Afternoon guys, 

So, last time we spoke I was on my balcony looking out towards the beach and anticipating the next seven days with Miss Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee. And what an amazing way to spend those seven days. Miss Tweedle-Dumb, Miss Tweedle-Dee and I have not spent a single day away from the beach and have indulged in some of our favourite holiday activities including getting so tanned we look like locals and the girls dragging me out to sea so far I can't touch the floor and freak out. 

Miss Tweedle-Dee has now got an arm the size of Jupiter as she has been bitten by Mosquito's so much and as a result has an arm the would resemble something from the plague. I however have not been cursed and for some odd reason the Mozzies prefer her blood, which I'm not complaining at. In fact one evening just before I tucked Miss Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee in bed they alerted me to a speck on our ceiling which was indeed a Mosquito. Without a seconds thought and wanting to protect my friends from the blood-thirsty fiend I took a magazine, jumped on the bed and whacked him so hard I nearly went flying. After finding my balance again I realised that there was screams and laughter erupting from where the girls lay. Looking up to the ceiling I found out why. I had hit the poor insect so hard he had exploded a beautiful blood splat right in his place. Worried that our cleaner may notice I explained how it wasn't noticeable, although we all new it was there for the remainder of our holiday. 

Along with the odd insect murder on our hands we also lived out some childhood dreams. As Miss Tweedle-Dumb, Miss Tweedle-Dee and I have known each other for years we knew what sort of upbringings we have had, Miss Tweedle-Dumb and I especially. So on the first day we bought a Lilo each and never looked back. We rode the waves and even attempted to surf on the inflatables, that is until Miss Tweedle-Dumb's died of deflation. All three of us turned into kids for the majority of the week often having more than one ice-cream a day and sometimes even for brunch! We got on a Pedalo and rode out to see and even went on a boat trip which was lots if fun. 

Playing a game of 'Inuendo Bingo' also provided a source of entertainment when Miss Tweedle-Dumb and I sat down with a mouth full of water and waiting to see who would crumble first at the sound of something funny from Miss Tweedle-Dee's holiday read. Lets just say that we both got very, very wet. Thankfully though no arguments apart from something trivial which ended up with Miss Tweedle-Dumb throwing water at me, I squirted sun cream at her and before we knew it we had coated the whole apartment in sun lotion and water which made for a very slippery surface as Miss Tweedle-Dumb found out. Attempting to chase me into the bedroom to get me with the water she slipped on the creamy floor and fell right onto her bottom. Definately the top highlight of my holiday. 

There was some serious stuff too. I have had a lot to think about and have come to the conclusion that whilst I love Miss Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee, as well as my family and other friends; I am ready for a change in scenery. I have thought for a long time about moving away and maybe spending a few months living somewhere different. Dublin, Ireland maybe or somewhere closer like Cardiff, Wales. I want to do it over this coming Winter, maybe October 'til March next year - Just some time to find myself and gain some experience of the world. Wherever I go though I am sure I shall have some tales to tell. And who knows I may even find 'The One'.

Speaking of which I have been thinking about the scary world that is dating for a while now and I think it's about time to get back out there. So after a year of being single after the train-wreck that was my last relationship I am finally ready to meet someone new - And Miss Tweedle-Dee is too! As soon as we get back from sunny Majorca I plan on looking into speed dating for Miss Tweedle-Dee, Miss Chocolate and I. We all need to find our Prince Charming and he won't come looking for us, despite how much we want him to arrive at our workplace one day on a white steed carrying a large bouquet of flowers and a box of fine chocolates. I am positive that Mr. Right is out there for me and all my friends, they just need hunting down and capturing. 

And so we come to the end of another week, this time it was in the sun. Sadly though our flight back home to a drizzly Blighty is tonight. Speaking of which I best go and find Miss Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee. I left them outside to catch some rays again. I hope they haven't been cremated ...

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Time For A Little Sunshine...

Hey everyone, 

So I am currently writing to you from the very sunny and beautiful island of Majorca in Spain. Slightly chilly out but still, the sun is shining and I don't have work. 

The past week has been fun although not much has happened in the way of anything, apart from having to comfort a very glum and self-destructive Mr. Mot after I had a phone all at one in the morning. I attempted to pamper his ego as much as possible and make him feel better about himself especially what with his current situation, but it was all in vain as he still carried on in the same self-loathing he had started the conversation with. After an hour and a bit of trying to make him feel better I gave up and ended the call. Nevertheless the following day he was as right as rain and back to his cheery, if a little crude and flirtatious self.  Mostly this week though has been preparing for this week. Miss Tweedle-Dee and Miss Tweedle-Dumb have been stressing about packing and departure times and such like all week, where as I have been as cool as a cucumber and have been relaxed, that is up until the wax...

So after my appointment at my local college being booked in on the half-term holidays in the south of England and so therefore being unavailable I found myself a little salon near where I work. Reasonably priced and with the schedule open I booked without hesitation. Upon arriving to said venue some minutes late due to the train being cancelled I was ready to be de-fluffed! Little did I know that walking over hot coals would have been a more pleasurable experience. If you are thinking about it ladies and gentleboys; DON'T - It hurts! Thinking it would be a good idea for holiday is one thing but then carrying it out with a women who you don't even know is another. I mean firstly there was the fact that I had bought new jeans previously and that the dye had rubbed off onto my legs so I looked like an overgrown Smurf. Secondly, less than ten minutes in and because my legs are made of 99.9% cellulite, she spilled hot wax all over me as the roller machine that she was using got trapped in one of my fat pockets. And then there was the sheer fact that she had a looked and touched something that a guy only gets to after he's taken me for dinner. Bareing (no pun intended) this in mind, my legs are still smooth ... ish. Definitely not worth it for the money, the pain or the bite marks on the back of my hands as a result. 

Miss Tweedle-Dee, Miss Tweedle-Dumb and I arrived mid morning after a long morning spent traipsing round the airport looking for a coffee shop so that all three of us could function properly as it was like three in the morning. The flight itself was pretty straight forward, but as we were taxing down the runway, for some odd reason I felt an overwhelming urge to kiss someone. To be honest I felt a bit emotional going on holiday again. I always do though. I suppose it doesn't help that I feel this way every time I go away because it was the last time I went on holiday with Mr. Workaholic that he decided to make his own mind up about our relationship. Regardless of that though, I am having a splendid time already. Miss Tweedle-Dumb is having a nap before we head out to dinner. So far there have been no arguments although I have had to seclude myself onto the balcony as Miss Tweedle-Dee is making so much random chitter chatter by talking to herself that I can barely hear myself think. 

And so after a fun and vibrant day in Majorca, Spain it's time to clock off as I am starving and Miss Tweedle-Dee, Miss Tweedle-Dumb and I still have to hunt out dinner. Need to wake them up first which shall be a task and a half as Miss Tweedle-Dumb is already snoring. Uhh, she also just farted, how classy of her slumbering self. This will be an interesting few days to watch out for next week. 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou :) xx

Past and Present

Evening Guys,
 
And so this week begins. A week - up until this evening was normal. The weekend to be honest was very uneventful whereby I spent the entire thing lying in my bed only to come out of my self-made 'Lady-Cave' for food and a shower. Sums me up perfectly really.
 
Tonight Miss Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee coming round to have a catch up after I have had my dinner and they have been hiding in a pub round the corner for fear of embarrassing themselves in front of my Dad who has known them for years. Regardless the evening started in good spirit, laughing and joking as we reminisced of the good old days. We talked a little of Mr. Coffee, but not as much as I would have liked given the fact that he is still on my brain.
 
We have arranged a girlie weekend away to Newcastle at the beginning of March and am looking forward to it alot, if a little apprehensious about the the trip to an area of the country that holds such painful and vivid connotations and memories. In the pasted I have visited twice, both times with my Ex - Mr. Workaholic. As well as that we watched YouTube.com videos, discussed fashion and planned our holiday to Majorca (I know - its changed). It has now been booked and paid for ... Shhh - Don't tell Daddy! Playing around on my old and  faithful laptop I stumbled across some photos of us from when we were kids and started to flick. Only when I tried to escape did they catch the folder I had long forgotten contained the first trip abroad I had ever taken. With Mr. Workaholic. And his mother and partner. Tad awkward you could say. Upon closer inspection of the lost archive of photos and memoirs they found the videos that documented the very last days of my relationship with Mr. Workaholic as I knew it. Pawing through the videos I began to see just how blind I was to it all and how much of a good liar he was.
 
Don't get me wrong it wasn't a relationship that ended badly in the sense that there was infidelity or anything, just that he felt there was more out there than me and he wanted to find it all out. Mr. Workaholic had felt like this for a long time apparently and throughout that holiday everything seemed to change and his head started to wonder more than before. The videos were a stark and brutally honest reminder of how things genuinely used to be - Play fights that got out of hand, annoying each other, Mr. Workaholic putting me down or making foul comments, but also laughs and giggles and happiness. There was no playing up to the camera, or exaggerating anything. Just a true and honest relationship that would blossom further as the years rolled by. But that never came to be as in the coming weeks things became clearer to Mr. Workaholic and he decided to call it off in late Spring - nearly a year ago.
 
Miss Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee found the footage amusing and laughable both at my expense and Mr. Workaholic's. I however struggled to hear the voices of a happier time, let alone look at the screen that would clearly display what I lost. Holding back tears and the swelling that was getting bigger in my throat I soldiered on because I knew that my friends wanted to see them. See into a world that was exclusive to us and see what it was like, maybe trying to work out where it all went wrong. They would never admit it but they could see how happy I was with him and how devastated I was having to relive every bit of it just for there enjoyment. I looked at the screen several times and after building up enough courage and immunity to the films I decided to watch the next one in full without turning away. I couldn't. "And here comes my girlfriend..." a friendly voice chirped happily as I appeared on camera. I shut it down as the girls turned to each other and one let out an "Awwh" As we continued through the collection of little home-movies I found it harder. but not as hard as the last few.
 
One of the last clips to play was the hardest. I double-clicked to open it and on came the screen, filled with my face and his. Mr. Workaholic. He kissed my on the cheek. He said "I love you" He cuddled me. I started to crumble. It finished playing and as I looked back at my trusted pals I started to sob. I felt so stupid. Why should I be crying over something that was over nearly a year ago? Comforting words were given and a few apologetic rubs of the arm, mixed in with many bad language to describe Mr. Workaholic's attitude towards me in some of the less upbeat videos. I know they felt bad about forcing me to watch them but I needed to. It will make me stronger and better in the long run. You need to give someone a shot of poison before they get better. After that they swiftly left, not before scarring my mind with an indecent video of young lady trying to digest a sanitary component. They know I hate talking about periods .... Ewwww - even typing makes me feel like throwing up. Just for the record I call that time of the month 'Carrie' as the first 8 minutes of the Hollywood-flick Carrie completely sums how I feel about it up. If you haven't seen it then you need to. YouTube.com it now!
 
I am now sitting on the edge of my bed contemplating the fact that this has opened up a Pandora's box that I never wanted to return to, and now I am, especially after such recent issues as Mr. Coffee, It makes me wonder weather calling the whole thing off with him was a good idea. Mr. Workaholic was nice at times but he was also very mean and degrading to me where as Mr. Coffee is nice and sweet. He is all holding hands and kissing on the cheek. I like that. I like him. Maybe I should do something about it?

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

Welcome

OK. So firstly welcome to my blog and the first post of the new year. It is January the fist and like many other people across the country I have made a few new year resolutions for 2013. I firstly thought that maybe getting a job might be a good idea and then on Christmas eve I had a phone call from a interview I had earlier in the week and was told that the job was mine. So now I am a working women as an administrator and general clerical assistant for a local flooring company. I start tomorrow. Find a job. Tick!

Next on my new years resolutions list is to loose some chunk. I am not a BBW as they would say in the industry but I am not a skinny french fry either I like to class myself as a 'normal' sized women and enjoy flaunting the fact that I'm not a twig. But yes I think that I could do with some toning up and slimming down. At some point as well during the new year, I want to move out of my parents place and into an abode of my own. My friends have already started buying me things for my new pad and I cant wait to finally have a place to call and make home. Once I have my own place I want to purchase a little French bulldog puppy. I have no name ideas as yet but I kinda wanna keep it French but would be grateful for any suggestions.

On another one of my many growing plus points so far this year is a possible blossoming 'thing'. I don't want to divulge too much as I don't want to spoil something before it has even happened. He is a childhood sweetheart and we re-kindled our friendship just before Christmas last year. He is very sweet and extremely overprotective, which is an odd experience for an independent and self-sufficient young lady such as myself. We are planning a few dates and I really do enjoy spending time with him but I want to take it slow and not end up in he same train wreck that I did last time I said the 'L' word and fell head over heels for someone. Slow and steady won the race said the tortoise.

And so now I shall make like the tortoise and sign off for the evening. After the night I had last night I think I need a well deserved bath and a catch up with my telly.

'Til next time, Love A.Lou :) xx