Buy Cheap, Buy Twice ... As Many!

Heyy, 

So wedding planning has been put on hold for a while, considering Halloween, Christmas and all those wintery, autumnal activities. However with Christmas fast approaching I have word from Santa and his Elves that our Tweedle is coming home for the Holidays! After a brief phone-call a moment ago with Mrs Tweedle-Dumb, I am pleased to announce that she will be coming back to the UK with her husband for Christmas, flying in on the big day and staying until New Years. Plenty of time for catch-ups, chats, sleepovers and wedding stuff. 

One of the things I really need to hammer down on and get arranged when Mrs Tweedle-Dumb is back will be the bridesmaid's dresses. Now it is all good and well-going shopping and trying on dresses, however, I know that I will never buy them from a shop and more likely to buy online, almost certainly shipping them in from China or Asia as far cheaper and generally of acceptable quality.

Now initially, back in the day, I was suspicious of the pricing and the quality of goods from Asian countries, however, whilst looking for a cheap bargain on dresses for other peoples weddings or events I was going to, I began to trust and even become pro in ordering stuff online from cheap websites such as AliExpress, Wish.com and eBay. Our culture tells us that things are priced at specific points for a reason and to question anything that is below or higher than this. 

Sizing is a big deal and I can honestly say it has been the one bugbear I have with ordering from Asian countries. There is no fat size? Now it is common knowledge that Chinese sizings often run small but some sellers are getting better and along with the bog-standard small, medium, large and extra-large, very often they will now post measurements in centimetres or inches to check against so that you order something that fits you right. This being said however they also they jump from country to country for dress sizes so be sure you are looking at the right one as a US, Australian, EU and UK dress size are not the same. Scour the listing very carefully to check which they're using, although on the other hand, if they're a Chinese designer/manufacturer and are making things for you themselves rather than a wholesaler, they will sometimes do made-to-order custom stuff, something I will definitely be keeping an eye out for when purchasing the real deal.  

Now, this is not to say everything I have ordered from the East has been a success with multiple failures, returns and refunds made along the way the last few years, nevertheless I find a lot of the time you are buying the same goods but directly from the wholesaler or manufacturer, effectively cutting out the middle man. This can mean you get the exact same product for less than you would pay in the high street or online retailers and whilst sometimes it means the product is better, sometimes it means the product is worse because of that annoying middleman would order a sample before deciding which items are worth investing in fully. You win some and you lose some but if you're happy with a gamble it could be worthwhile. 

On the subject of returns and refunds, be prepared that trying to return broken/damaged items to China are difficult at the best of times and sellers will make every effort not to accept returns, even if their listing says it does. Truth is, the return postage costs more than the original item itself so if you are going down this route, be prepared to save yourself the effort and either buy something you know you definitely want or be ready to make a decision to write off the cost.

Getting your item in the first place can always be a bit of an ordeal too and you will not have to search long or hard in order to find horror stories of dresses, wedding, bridesmaid or otherwise as well as many, many other things that are ordered and never show up. Sometimes they can take the expected four-weeks to a month to turn up, but other times they take well over that to arrive. Then again, other times, they amaze you by turning up in a week. The reasons for such a difference in postal timings is entirely dependant on the seller and their choice of the postal carrier. When it's free postage, you can't really complain though and ticking the "gift" column on customs declaration card can help smooth things along the way of providing faster delivery. Sometimes they say "commercial sample" in which case you may or may not get hit by customs charges but to avoid customs charges on personal purchases, make sure you put multiple purchases through separately and ask for separate shipping as it will save you many moula's and is completely legal in the UK - as long as you're not a business. 

And so as I placed my order through eBay (all £600.00+ of dresses) I excitedly listened to my phone ping with notifications of the orders being accepted and shipped. Initially, my thought process is to order several types of different dresses and styles to check out quality, shape, fit, sizing and colour. Then I will send them all back, get a refund and then purchase similar or even better with the middleman cut out the same dress via a China-based store/seller, thus saving in the long run. 

Yes it is a faff and yes it is a hassle, however with Mrs Tweedle-Dumb back for only a couple of short weeks, I need to make sure that what I am ordering is something that both her and Miss Tweedle-Dee will both wear and be happy in come my wedding day. The problem is that there are so many variations and even with these ones I get the girls to try on there are so many things that could change or be different about the ones ordered from China. UK ordered dresses may fit better and vice-versa or measurements might be out slightly. Don't even get me started on colours either - Is red a dark red or bright red? Is Burgandy the same colour as Wine? Are two Wines the same colour tone? Is Blush and Pink identical? Is plum actually just a lilac or a deep cherry? And what the fuck is a dusty peach? 

Calm. Stressing aside, as long as I follow all the simple guidelines I have used for years I will be fine. Remember ladies (and maybe gents too) if you are buying from far-flung destinations make sure the seller has at least 98% positive feedback, be patient and size correctly and you should be fine. She says until all twenty-odd dresses turn up either late, way too small or damaged from being thrown over the fence. 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

The Cars, The Clothes and The Cameras

Heyy, 

It has been a while now hasn't it? You know since we indulged in all things wedding-y. And so I thought I should update you, at least since the weekend Mr Warehouse and I had was fairly plain in comparison to others that have come before it, what with Krakow and scare mazes and Halloween parties and spa days. 

So throughout the summer, I decided to let wedding planning sit on the back burner, what with holidays to Malaga and a family wedding, I thought best to enjoy summer as next year I will probably be stressed to my eyeballs. That being said however I had made some crucial bookings and purchases, and, with the help of a magical fairy Godmother AKA my Irish Auntie I was able to book in hair and make-up, as well as our dream wedding car - a full-on Cruella De Vil, crossed with a Brum Lookalike! The beautiful Regent Landaulette Tourer will be ours for the day, ferrying us from my home as I leave for the church on my last ever journey as a Miss and onto our wedding Venue through the lush Bedfordshire countryside with my new Husband. The website explains how the gorgeous white car with black roof and ivory leather interior can seat more than just the Bride and Groom with space for Seven bottoms. And the most special part - The rear section of the roof can be taken down to have a semi convertible like royalty have, something I cant wait to see in the photos. Perfect for hopefully the warmer summer weather and yet prepared for a chilly winter wedding, this car has it all. 

Although I was taking a back seat to wedding planning and prep, I still kept my eyes peeled for a bargain and have even been able to find the skeleton to the dress of my wildest thoughts and daydreams. As I sat scrolling through eBay, I noticed that one of my watched items had ended. Checking it, thinking it was most probably a dog costume or something cute for my newest addition to the family, I was surprised to see it was a dress. Intrigued I clicked through and saw a stunning gown for sale, but it had ended already, and with no bids as well. Disappointed to have lost out I messaged the seller, "VampGirl3000" or something odd like that. The lady explained that it was her Daughters and after buying it from a posh and expensive boutique bridal wear shop in a village locally, she had changed her mind and decided to get married abroad and therefore changed her dress. I knew the shop well and they catered for the plus-size lady and after trying on some dresses there with Mrs. Tweedle-Dumb when she was over in the Spring, I knew it was a steal at the already listed £250. Cheekily I asked if she would £150. She said no. But she did say that if I was interested she would take £200. I pushed my luck and said if she would take £175 I could collect that very week. Shockingly she accepted, and, sure as my word I rolled up at just coming up to 6pm, Miss Tweedle-Dee by my side. I was nervous as we waited by the door. 

"What happens if I don't like it? What happens if I all of a sudden want a different style of dress? What happens if ..." I flapped. 
"Shut the fuck up. I have been to several bridal shops with you now and every time you have tried this style of dress on and it suits you and you look beautiful in them. The others either don't suit you or are not wedding-y enough, so quit your whining. Besides, if you change your mind, it's £175, you know you could sell it for double" Miss Tweedle-Dee soothed. Soon the door was opened and we were shown upstairs and allowed some time to try it on. It fit well, and with some minor altering (to take it in and up once I lose all this fat) plus some added and minus extras it will be perfect. Almost running downstairs, my Maid of Honour barely able to catch me up, holding the dress, I squealed to the lady that I loved it and wanted to take it home. And so that day I came home with my beautiful gown, hung it up and showed my puppies. 

The next thing I think on my list that I booked and organized was the DJ and Disco. Certainly the most difficult job of the day I think. Mr Warehouse and I love music and our tastes cover everything from post-world-war bops to current day and cheesey pops with everything in between. Thinking we might be able to help the man out, Mr. Warehouse and I made an evening of listening to the music channels and YouTube Wedding Playlists and selecting our top tunes. But the Top of the Pops it was not as several hours later we had not even tipped the iceberg that was anything by Sean Da Paul or Queen and we were already at four and a half hours worth of music and disco jams. This guy certainly had his work cut out and when he kindly met up with us in a local pub for a drink and a chat he certainly put us both at ease. Awkward at first, like a weird first date we talked about how Mr. Warehouse and I first met, some anecdotes on wedding planning and our lives together and a little bit about his background and type of work he does. I was settled to learn he does this most weekends and knows when to turn up the cheese and when to take it down a notch or two. 

The videographer has been booked and nearly all paid for, something Mr. Warehouse fully detested, although I feel is slightly warming to the idea now. As explained all those many moons ago in my blog "Seeking out our Scorsese", when I first thought about my wedding planning journey, even as far back as college and the heady Mr. Workaholic days I realised that I would want some sort of video footage. I suppose ever since doing Media Production and Media Studies as a student I knew the importance and deep-rooted connection that you can have to a video in accompaniment with sound and vision as opposed to just a still image. The way I see it is that you cannot put a price on your memoirs and 

I wanted something to start not with the preparation of the Bridal party at home but at the church just simply watching as everyone arrives, greeting familiar faces and watching people mingle before becoming forever entwined. This, in my head at least, would transition through to the moments at home as the wedding car arrives and sneak peeks of everyone's reaction to that wonderful gown before the final journeys of the bridal party to the church. Continuing to roll, the camera would capture the moment I see my groom for the first time and that all-important first glimpse, just before we become husband and wife. I am sure though that a good videographer will capture everything from the heartfelt vows through to the giggles in the speeches, flowing nicely the cutting of the cake, our very first dance as a married couple and ending with some candid shots of the Dance floor as people start to let the alcohol take control. 

When I look back on my wedding video in years to come, be it after an argument, with the kids, with the grandkids even or just us, I want to be transported back to that magical day and remember all the little things that happened that I may have missed and that my eyes didn't catch. I want to listen to people give me advice and laugh at everyone's antics. I want to look back and see the faces and movements and words, listening to their voice as I remember that they are maybe no longer with us. In all of that, chances are, no matter how sharp mine or my new Hubbies memory is, we won’t remember every single detail of it off by heart and it is for this additional reasoning, as well as the emotional side why nowadays couples like me (and Mr. Warehouse) are opting to have wedding videography. 

Suffice to say that with less than a year to go (in fact with ten months, four weeks and one day) to go, I am more excited than ever and cannot wait to become Mrs. Warehouse!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

A Wedding Like No Other!

Hello, 

With less than a few days until his operation I thought I would again try and teach my puppy some valuable life skills, like how to conduct ones self when in a peculiar environment whilst containing bowel movements, sitting in the front seat of a moving vehicle whilst not being sick or having a pampering sleepover round your Mom's friend's house as they all sit around chatting shit and smoking like it's1984 their in a seedy nightclub. 

I wouldn't say it was the best experience he has had, however, that being said it certainly went a lot better than anticipated. I started our trip as I normally do stopping off at Nanny Pumpkin's for a coffee and a biscuit. We chatted about mine and Mr Warehouses new edition since she had not yet met our little bundle of fur, cooeing over him like a new baby and admiring him from a distance. Truth be told I don't think that my Nanny Pumpkin is much of a pet person especially that of dogs. I assume, partly from what she has told me and partly from my own judgement that as a military family they were surrounded by families who would get a dog or a cat and then have to give it up several weeks later when they moved army barracks only to be disappointed when Mittens or Rover could not come with them. I do recall somewhere that my father and his brothers had won a goldfish at a local fair and that my Nanny Pumpkin had agreed to let them keep it. If I remember correctly that the goldfish met its end in the same way many do with one flush and a toilet burial. 

I briefly saw my aunty, uncle and cousins as they had also popped by to see me and the new puppy, after which I tried to dash over to my other Nana's to see my uncle and her before my uncle went to go and play golf. I knew before even stepping foot inside the jazzy carpeted house that she had lived in for the last decade or so that my Scottish Nana would be much more reciprocal to my baby-pooch. I knew for a fact that my Nana had grown up in the harsh reality of postwar Scotland with Jack Russells and other dogs, always a good companion for running across summer fields and icy winter walks. Picking him up she cuddled him like a toddler and even let him lick her face which I know a lot of people detest. 

I thought to myself as I listened to several of the same stories as I had before over and over again that ultimately these will be the moment I will cherish once she is gone. In her mid-80's now her soft white curls seemed to wiggle whenever she would laugh about some of the good times that she used to have back in her younger years. We spoke alot about my upcoming wedding next year and discussed a lot about her wedding and how different it was back then. 

I never knew that my mother's parents met when my Granda had come to stay at my Nana's house with her family as he was working locally in a small Scottish village near the border of England. After several weeks, work took my Granda elsewhere in the country but before he had left making sure that my Nana kept in touch. Several weeks later my great-great-grandmother (my Nana's Nana) fell ill and in her final few moments shared some wisdom that it would not be the last time that my Nana and my Granda met. Sure enough, following the funeral, my Nana sent a letter to my Granda informing him of the death in the family. Soon enough they were writing every week to one another and slowly but surely over the week's their friendship turned to love and grew stronger. 

Just over a year after meeting, work brought my Granda back into the area again and they met again. This time my Granda asked my Nana to marry him. Wonderful news and exciting updates for the families, except for there was one big problem. He was Protestant and she was Catholic. From my very basic understanding and knowledge of either side, They worship the same God, but the principles of their faith are different? In any circumstance, my Nana's parents were not having any of it and refused the relationship, even so much so that after fainting and falling over, my great-grandmother forced my Nana (woozy on pain medication) to write a letter to her fiance telling him that she no longer wanted to marry him. 

Had my Nana's sister not said anything then I may well not be here sharing the story with you. Several months later after multiple letters whilst my Granda was away working my Nana went to go and meet him. Stepping off the bud from a nearly thirty-mile round trip, it was like they had never been a part and without a moment to spare my Granda took my Nana by the hand and they went to buy a ring. Now telling her parents wasn't easy and after moving away to be closer to him she had upset her parents greatly. So much so that by the time the wedding rolled around a few weeks later, none of her family turned up, not even her father to walk her down the aisle. My Nana didn't wear a white dress and instead opted for a traditional shift suit with a boxy coat all in traditional tartan tweed. Every person in the Church in Oxford was from my Granda's side of the family and a few friends. And all because he was Protestant and she was Catholic. 

Her black and white wedding photos were certainly something to look back on and cherish as she recalled and remembered how the day went. And as my little fur baby fell asleep hold-up on the jazzy carpet I thought about how this could be me in a few decades time, remembering all the fun and joyous moments I had with friends and family at my own wedding. I think that it is certainly moments like this that I cherish just talking and in a way getting to know my Nana before she was a Nana. Finding out all those little things that makes her who she is and in a way trickles down the tree, making me who I am and who my children will be. 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx

If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad?

Hi!

So one week on from being the "The Goldilocks of Dress Shopping" and following the so-called biggest wedding show in the UK - The National Wedding Show, I just cannot stop thinking about that dress! Which one you may ask? Well, after stepping into the final store of the day and with my entourage of Mrs Tweedle-Dumb & Miss Tweedle-Dee for company lagging behind from lack of caffeine, sugar and sleep most likely, I picked out a few dresses that I was happy to try on and headed through to the dressing room. 

Each of them I tried on and each of them I loved more than the last. I realised only after leaving the shop and flicking through the photos that my bridesmaids took of me wearing the gowns was that actually, I had already tried on two of them in a different store next door to the bridal boutique where I won the afternoon tea experience. Now I must say that at this point if I have already tried on the same dress twice then it must say a lot about it and how I feel wearing it. Although the full gather skirt on the Camellia Ball Gown gives the most incredible shape with the beaded lace appliques making for the ultimate princess gown, I had fallen for Tilly, a very similar glamorous take on a classic sweetheart wedding dress with yet more feminine tulle skirt which floated as I walked and once again, finished with irresistible appliqués in the Northampton branch of Wed2B. But whilst were just as beautiful as each other, and mostly fitted well considering my odd sizing, they were not the one dazzling my head when daydreaming. The dress in question was Letitia. The exclusive Platinum Edition waterfall ball gown was the ultimate princess wedding dress. With long creamy folds and layers detailing the skirt and the luxurious bodice, encrusted with beaded embroidery adding the perfect sparkle. 

However despite Mrs Tweedle-Dumb, Miss Tweedle-Dee, the lady who was helping me, and her colleagues all telling me that I looked beautiful and stunning at the time in the shop, I just wasn't feeling it. With each curtain swish to reveal the outfit, I could tell everyone was growing impatient but with the biggest expense so far I was hesitant to say yes to the dress. I suppose just being in receipt of something so expensive I will only wear for a few hours is in itself a little daunting. 

That is why this week I have decided to take up the task of not only trying to secure a caterer but also to have a look online for a wedding dress. My first go to was eBay as I figured that most of the styles I like would be there on the website both used and new. I was right! Hammering down some of my choices in the filters tabs I was looking for something that would resemble a combination of Tilly, Camellia and Letitia. As I have said before, I am not searching for the floods of tears, whoops and holla's that I would expect from a "Say yes to the dress" TV moment, but I do need a dress that is going to tell a story about me and how unique and funny and different I am. I need it to embrace my curves and show off my incredible parts and hide those that I don't like so much. I need something that says "That is so her". I need a dress that says me without me even wearing it. Continuing my search online, I have yet to find the one, but I am optimistic in finding it and maybe I will have a little rest until maybe some family are over in the summer and we can go again. In the meantime, however, I will record more episodes of Say Yes To The Dress UK. 

Confetti & Lace for over three decades has provided a personal and professional service to all brides but the best bit is that the store opens their doors time and time again to the hit TLC television program following brides on a quest to find the perfect gown for their big day. With the help of David Emanuel, the designer of Princess Diana's iconic wedding dress, Gown designer Christine Dando and the attentive staff with all their knowledge and expertise the help to guidance to the show's brides (and their sometimes testing entourage too) gets intense on the journey to find the to the dress of their dreams! Uhh if that doesn't scream Saturday indoors with blankets and PJ's, I don't know what does!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx 

The Goldilocks of Dress Shopping

Heyy!

Standing in line, I was surprised that the queue was not longer considering this was the biggest wedding show in the UK - The National Wedding Show. With everything a bride and her entourage could every dream of under the beautiful glass-domed roof of Olympia London I was in awe of the venue and looking forward to walking around sampling champagne whilst looking at all the different suppliers and vendors. Amazing wedding dresses, stunning catwalk shows, expert advice and all with free tickets in hand. 

As we entered the lobby area, I was more than ready to elbow out my fellow brides in order to get special show offers, help and advice from over 250 wedding specialists. However on walking through into the Grand Hall and after about an hour or so of walking around as well as watching the first catwalk show I have to say that I was quite disappointed. On my long list of suppliers and vendors to hunt out in order to apply for competitions or sign up for freebies were quite a few that were not present at the London Olympia National Wedding Show. Krispy Kreme doughnut stand was missing and the authentic Italian ice cream man was also lost. 

"Nevermind though I thought", walking back from a cigarette break outside "there are lots of stunning dresses at multiple stands that I am sure I can try on". I suppose part of me was correct - Yes there were lots of stands and yes there were lots of dresses however most if not all of the guns on offer to try on we're all a UK size 14 or under. And by this standard assuming that the rule still applies that for your bridal gown should be at least two if not three dress sizes bigger than what you normally are on the High Street or in normal clothes. This, in turn, would mean that I would have to be a UK size 8 or size 10 in order to try on any of the wedding dresses at what was advertised as the UK's biggest wedding show. Somehow I think not!

The more I think about this fact, both then and now, it infuriates me. People (unlike me on this occasion) pay good money and even take time off of work to travel far and wide to a wedding show where they claim to have the widest variety of suppliers including wedding dresses and bridal wear specialists and yet only choose to supply a few gowns in a few small sizes not catering for anyone else. Here in the UK, our average dress size for a woman is around about a size 16 which would roughly be equated to wearing a wedding dress or bridal gown in a size 20 to 22. Now, why is that not reflected? 

Nevertheless, Mrs Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee struggled on with me, sore feet and aching arms from all the books and leaflets we were carrying around. After an hour or two of walking around the same vendors flogging the same old stuff we were all bored and with not much more inspiration to suck from the place we decided to bounce. I would say in the experience of The National Wedding Show was mediocre at best and am pleased that I did not pay for tickets as if I had I think I would have been even more disappointed than I was. Looking back on some of the other wedding shows that I have been to both in my local area and a few miles out, I have always been able to get a lot more out of small local independent's rather than what is classed as the UK's biggest! 

That being said however that this wedding show is perfect for those that have recently got engaged or haven't a clue where to start on their wedding planning journey, but a word of wisdom to my fellow Brides or Brides-to-be out there - Make sure that you do your research and if you are not prepared to pay megabucks then maybe consider a local wedding show or fair before heading to some of the National big boys as I can almost certainly guarantee that you will be able to find exactly what you are looking for by a friendly and local supplier ready and willing to take on your business. They will be just as capable as a supplier at one of the National wedding shows and yet will probably charge a lot less for something it just as special for your big day without a massive Price Tag and will probably care a little more too!

Calling it a day Mrs Tweedle-Dumb, Miss Tweedle-Dee and I decided to head over to the Westfield shopping centre in order to grab some dinner and a spot of shopping before heading home for a sleepover - Just like the good old days! The following morning I anticipated coffee and a light breakfast before heading out with my maid and matron of honour to try on wedding dresses! I was keen to get a few visits booked in especially when I have both of my besties on hand for gentle criticism and polite judgement. 

The first Bridal Boutique we stepped into we were all offered a cup of coffee which was much needed as we had not had any of the light breakfast I had intended due to waking up late. Walking around the store cloaked in wedding dresses and feeling as though I was Mr Tumnus in Narnia, there was not much is anything at all in my size and so I grabbed a couple of dresses just to make it seem as though we have not come for a free coffee. 

The next bridal shop Mrs Tweedle-Dumb and I left Miss Tweedle-Dee in the car for a nap as I was certain that she was suffering from a lack of caffeine and a poor night's sleep on my crumby sofa-bed. This store seemed much more positive as its ethos was to help the plus size lady find her dream dress. But just as the first so had been too small, the second store was way too big catering for up to a UK size 30! I did, however, fall for a few gowns there although there are no pictures as apparently, the designers get very funny about photos being taken something I personally think is a crock of shit. 

Stepping into the final score of the day was my Goldilocks moment and with this in mind, I picked out 4 or 5 dresses that I was happy to try on and headed through to the dressing room. Each of them I tried on and each of them I loved more than the last. However despite Mrs Tweedle-Dumb, Miss Tweedle-Dee, the lady who was helping me, and her colleagues all telling me that I looked beautiful and stunning, I just wasn't feeling it. With each curtain swish to reveal the outfit, I could tell Miss Tweedle-Dee was growing impatient and that she wanted me to buy. The dress in question was Letitia. The exclusive Platinum Edition waterfall ball gown was the ultimate princess wedding dress. With long creamy folds and layers detailing the skirt and the luxurious bodice, encrusted with beaded embroidery adding the perfect sparkle I could see her point. But with the biggest expense so far I was hesitant to say yes to the dress. Mrs Tweedle-Dumb took one look at me however and said exactly what I was thinking, reading my mind like a novel. 
"You are wondering if it is too early to say yes and that if there is something else better out there. I know that you are thinking about this and that it is something you are concerned about. Let me ask you one question though - If you were to be in the same position, standing here this time next year, I know you would not be as hesitant." Mrs Tweedle-Dumb said, softly but stern. And like that, it was an arrow to my heart. Having Mrs Tweedle-Dumb and Miss Tweedle-Dee there knowing that they knew me better than I even knew myself was somewhat scary yet comforting. 

Having Mrs Tweedle-Dumb home the last couple of weeks has been incredible and having her and Miss Tweedle-Dee around more times than I think I could shake a stick at has been wonderful. But alas all good things must come to an end. By the end of this week Mrs Tweedle-Dumb will be back home in sunny L.A. It will certainly be different not to have her around but I am sure it will not be long until we are all reunited and yet in the meantime I am sure that Miss Tweedle-Dee and I will have plenty of fun - Wedding or not!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx 

No Ruffles or Puffy Sleeves - Be My Bridesmaid Pretty Please!

Afternoon Ya'll!

Within hours of Mrs Tweedle-Dumb's flight landing, she was stood on my doorstep. wrapped up warm in a winter coat and jeans she looks comfy yet tired from her travels, and I don't think that I have ever given her a bigger hug than I did then before welcoming her into my new home which she had yet to see in the flesh. As I gave her the tour of my new abode we giggled and laughed like we always had. 

With Miss Tweddle-Dee by her side, it was as though we had never been apart. On finishing at the house tour we decided to get down to the nitty-gritty of wedding planning and some of the ideas that Mr Warehouse and I had in mind for our big day. Honestly, I suppose that I really thought that the distance would have made our friendship completely different, but sat there on Thursday evening watching telly and cracking jokes I had almost forgotten that we had not actually been altogether since September of last year, more than five months ago. 

As nice as it was having my girls around me once more, there was a reason they were there, something I will not dive too deep into but emotionally has been draining me and sucking me dry for months now. I don't think that I ever said it to them both but I appreciated them being there more than I think they could have ever known. Their help and support has been completely invaluable in the last few years, and especially so in the last twelve months. I know that they will think I am a soppy old wet bag but I honestly don't know where I would have been without them. 

Reading an article the other night in bed, "The Brides Guide to Bridesmaids" I realised that I had some good candidates for the job. Planning your wedding is not easy. Everyone has advice. Everyone has an opinion. I am certain that over the next few months before my big day with Mr Warehouse there will be many an argument or disagreement with friends and family to include everything from the seating plan to who is invited and what is being fed to everyone. I need a strong entourage that will be able to swat out anything (or anyone) that is going to ruin my wedding day and preparations. I think that most of my family know that I am a force to be reckoned with and that any criticism will not be taken well, therefore I do not expect there to be many disagreements, however people do strange things will the run-up to getting hitched. 

As a bride-to-be, wedding chief executive and senior creative officer, I know I will be faced with a barrage of questions, comments and suggestions from everyone, including my bridesmaids. I hope that Miss Tweedle-Dee and Mrs Tweedle-Dumb's help, direction and guidance will make the prep and planning much more effective and waay easier.

In historical references, the bridesmaid and her duties were varied across cultures, religions and time periods. In early Roman times, bridesmaids formed a kind of bridal infantry as they accompanied the bride to the groom's village. This "protective shield" of similarly outfitted bridesmaids was supposed to intervene if any wayward thugs or vengeful suitors tried to hurt the bride or steal her dowry.  In Western society, however, bridesmaid tradition seems to have originated from later in the Roman law in which a wedding required ten witnesses in order to outsmart evil spirits believed to attend marriage ceremonies. The bridal party all dressed in identical clothing to the betrothed so that the evil spirits wouldn't know who was getting married. Even as late as 19th century England, the belief still continued that ill-wishers could administer curses and taint the wedding still existed and can be depicted by Victorian wedding photographs where it can take quite a bit of inspection to pick out the bride and groom from among the other members of the bridal party!

In more modern times though whilst these early customs continue to have an influence today, the bridal party continues to serve a vital role in the wedding process, not by fending off hexes and robbers, but by providing key support staff and an advisory board. 21st Century bridesmaid skills include caring helpers, thoughtful organisers and skillful liaisons. Besides being an honoured member of the wedding party and special guest at the reception, today's bridesmaid is also designated as the bride's assistant. From shopping for dresses to writing place cards, their first duty is to be helpful. The payoff is that walk down the aisle, looking absolutely beautiful in a gown that is stunningly stylish, super sophisticated, and absolutely wearable. 

Some brides in modern society decide to go with every Sarah, Lilly or Beatrix to be a bridesmaid, including everyone on the list from work colleagues to old school friends and that lady who serves you in the Costa drive-thru every Friday morning. Come on ladies it's just too much - Honestly, are you going to look back on those photos on your mantelpiece in years to come and answer your children's questions about who are beside you in your wedding photos. In most circumstances, they will be people that you will probably fall out with or would have not heard from in many years. It also seems to take away from the special-ness of the occasion and the absolute honour it is to be part of the bridal party. I suppose with these details in hand and the fact that Miss Tweedle-Dee and Mrs Tweedle-Dumb are highly skilled in keeping me calm and relaxed (usually by laughing to the point I pee) as well as comforting me in times of emotion and overwhelming-ness that I have asked them to be my bridesmaids. The question is - Will they accept?

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx 

The "W" Word

Hello everyone!

Following on from "The White, Lacy Condom Dress and Others" I have continued in my hunt for Wedding suppliers and items. As before, since Mr. Warehouse keeps insisting that we can't afford a holiday this year I have thrown myself head first into Wedding Planning and so all of my focus and energy is being put into planning our dream day. However, with still so much left to plan and organise I tried to focus my attention more on the bigger budget items, such as the catering. 

One of the first things Mr Warehouse and I looked at was the guest list and how much it is swelling with each and every month that seems to pass. After settling down to a rough number we calculated a round figure and sent it out to as many caterers as we could find and think of within a thirty mile radius. Ideally we were, still are, looking for a sit down meal catering consisting of 2-courses and finishing with our wedding cake as dessert. The catering facilities at Stagsden Village Hall are minimal as it is a old school house converted into a pretty hall, however they do have two ovens with hobs and a fridge plus crockery, glasses and table wear we are able to use. 

Now I was quite understanding, as was Mr Warehouse, that we were not going to get Foie Gras or Duck Breast for our wedding breakfast, however we were anticipating something simple yet effective. Starting with some ideas around starters my fiance and I looked at Pate, Bread and Olives, Soup or a Seafood Cocktail. For mains I was looking for something easy and cost effective also which would please many such as a Chicken Chasseur, Casserole, Pasta dish or Chilli Con Carne. Obviously it would be assumed that all the dishes are served with Seasonal Vegetables and a Potato product where appropriate. 

Sending out the simple suggestions and stating that the event we were catering for was a "family meal" rather than the 'W' word as it seems to add on an extra thirty or forty percent to the total bill for no apparent reasoning. Essentially this is still true since the only difference between a genuine family meal and a wedding is that I am going to be sat in a fat white dress. With this we looked forward to the quotes that were to follow, however many came back stating that our budget would simply be too low to accommodate. 

We were however lucky enough to find a few suppliers that were able to supply us with a quote and even some different food choices and sample menu's that were in line with the budget. My fiance and I had asked commonly requested things from anyone providing food for an event such as is the price inclusive or excluding VAT, if they provide the linens and how many servers would they suggest? Other easily answerable questions followed such as will the servers be uniformed, whether they work with fresh or frozen food and how would they handle last-minute requests or changes. Crucially we wanted to know if they charge a cake-cutting or serving fee as we wanted to have the dessert as the cake and also wanted to double check they have a current food license. On the day we needed to know for planning purposes how long they will need for setting up and if we can get references from others they had catered for. Obviously we needed to confirm when we should give the final guest numbers and what their menu choices would be. 

Although after several back and forth emails asking for some of the above questions asked to the caterers we were sent the details on tastings and when we could potentially arrange a meeting so as to go through the exact menu and pay any holding fee or deposit. Then all of a sudden, Mr Warehouse and I received an email. In it the caterers stated that "After careful consideration and a discussion with the team [the catering company] are unable to catering for your event, as it wouldn't be cost effective for us to do so due to your requirements and budget." 

Following a huge let down like that I battled on and  I suppose like any normal person, you would ask many of the questions previously detailed when hosting an event; Be it a wedding, family event or birthday party all of which you would expect the same level of service and ergo the same price per head. But Ohhh No! 

Yet again after sending the same list of questions to another catering company, again simple questions anyone hiring for an event would ask, irrespective of the occasion, a confirmed menu and details on how to place an order and make payments were sent. Although just before we had a chance to print, sign, scan and send back we were told that they could not provide a fabulous menu compromising of Soup for starters and a Chicken main course with the cake as a dessert as "Unfortunately we may have crossed wires throughout e-mails, as [the catering company] were unaware that the catering required was for a Wedding as no mention of this throughout the correspondence and that our Wedding packages start from £30.00 + VAT per head due to the preparation involved and the high standard of service we like to provide for our brides."

Furious at being asked to pay nearly treble the original cost quoted, for a menu Mr. Warehouse and I were extremely happy with, I emailed them back:
"Apologies we are slightly confused with the pricing as we were quoted for a very simple menu, which we are very, very happy with and ready to book and yet now it is different? I am honestly shocked that the price has jumped to more than double with just the mention of the "w" word. We are not sure what the difference is between a family event which is really what it is as we are not having a big thing made about it at all. My Fiance and I don't have a huge amount of money either, hence only having a small family meal. For a price increase of £18.00+ what would we get for that as we are not fussy about preparation involved as they should be the same regardless of the function and the standards still kept high as we only wanted a sit down meal for close family and a handful of friends? I have also noticed that after reading the below email, the address is a local business we know very well and have visited many, many times before as you are local to Bedford's Priory Park which is where we walk our dog Roxy most weekends. In fact my fiance actually proposed to me just round the corner in one of the meadows so it would really mean a lot to us to have yourselves cater for us. Again I hope you are able to help with this as again I am flabbergasted as to why the price has increased so much. We are ready to book and just needed a few questions answering and are happy to pay in advance."

With this the catering company came back to us and attempted to justify the price increase, stating that they "feel from the original enquiry we made, there was a different impression of the type of catering and service required for the agreed price and anticipated only sending a maximum of two members of staff to serve and prepare the food for a maximum of two-three hours. The price originally quoted didn’t include linen hire (not that we need it I must add), set up or clearing away and that clearly this type of service is not sufficient for a Wedding Reception.    We understand when you have said that you would not be fussy about the preparation, but for a Wedding sit down meal there will be a lot more involvement to go towards making your Day a special occasion and we can’t offer this type of service for under our standard Wedding price of £30 + VAT per head."

I have yet to call them to discuss their pitiful offering, but I can just not believe that the mention of the word wedding would increase the price by nearly twenty-quid per head! Shocking and disgusting is beyond the words that I can describe but to be fair if I was some sort of supplier of goods and knew that I could get at least double if not triple the price for a wedding rather than the same event without such connotations then of course I would also be charging extra. However, the point I make is that I did not initially send out any queries or questions in relation to a wedding and only for a family event, which is as I said before, essentially what a wedding is. Rest assured I am sure that you will hear of the outcome soon as I rip them a new one ... 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx 

White, Lacy Condom Dress and Others

Hello everyone!

Swiftly moving on from the debacle that was last weekend's stuck-in-the-mud fiasco before a wedding fair that turned out to be really good, I was happy to hear some good news that I had won a afternoon tea experience in a bridal dress shop up the road in Northampton. And of course who else would I take but my trusty Maid of Honour herself Miss Tweedle-Dee. 

Most of the last few weeks since Christmas has been heavily occupied with Wedding Planning, to such an extent that I think Mr Warehouse would say is borderline obsessive and "Bridezilla" however I have to remind him that unfortunately we are not in a position financially in order to afford a holiday this year it would seem and so all of my focus and energy is being put into planning our dream wedding on what is becoming quite a tight budget. Finally we have booked a venue, a beautiful 'T-shaped' converted old school in a small village (smaller than the one I live in now) near to the Church we plan to marry, Mr. Warehouse's family church that everyone in his family all bar a handful have declared they're vows. In all fairness it would have been nice to have it in my family church, you know since I am the one christened and all, however with Mr. Warehouse referring to it as "The Asylum" and its less than perfect track record of my parents divorce, I struggled to find its importance to have it there, especially with the 1970's styled outside - See here! After we booked the venue the most important things come next. The Bar - Booked and we have even been able to book a free drink for everyone on arrival and even better; No charge for hiring! I suppose Mr. Warehouse and I now need to clothe ourselves, feed our guests and give them something to dance too! 

With still so much left to plan and organise, I was certainly glad of trying to get Mr Warehouse enthused about photographers, flowers, catering or transport. Leaving him at I'm on the sofa with football playing in the background Miss Tweedle-Dee and I headed to A Brides World in Northampton for my first ever experience of trying on wedding dresses. It was certainly a lot to take in with not only rails and rails of dresses hanging in there clear body bags for all to see but also a whole other floor. Now it is bad luck for a bride to be seen in her down before her big day and I also feel as though I should not be talking about it either as I see it almost as the same. With this in mind however I can tell you a few details about some of the beautiful gowns that I tried on. 

The first few we picked out, in fact I would go as far as to say that the majority of the dresses were all down to one type - Princessy! My very first outfit was the "Venus Bridal Wedding Dress" described online as a elegant sleek ball gown style wedding dress, perfectly crafted using gorgeous Mikado fabric and has a deep V neck line (although not deep enough for my slutty ass) to highlight the frame beautifully and finished with a delicate beading around the waist and full buttoned train detail. Now I must say that when I tried on this dress it was extremely hard to see myself standing there looking back at myself wearing white as firstly it is not a colour that I normally choose to wear as I am extremely clumsy and will drop sauce or spill coffee down myself. Secondly though, and I suppose more important so people tell me, was that despite the owner and my Maid of Honour telling me that I looked beautiful and stunning in it, I just wasn't feeling it although it was a absolutely stunning dress. I was asked the question if I felt as though I could walk down the aisle in it and truth be told I could but I just didn't feel like the real me, moreover a posher, more elegant me - Which is nice, but not the real A.Lou! All things considered though, As beautiful as the buttons and glittery belt were, it just wasn't for me; A very elegant, classic dress as I am sure you can see from the photos I have tagged, but for me it is something far too tame for my liking or my wedding.

My second choice was much more up my street. The glittering Stella York gown just spoke to me as soon as I saw it, and despite not fitting quite right, I felt like a dream! Again, described online as the perfect mix of romantic and just a little bit sexy, this designer wedding dress is a glittery gem! Available with long lace sleeves, this A-line wedding dress is composed of layered beaded lace and tulle and was the most comfiest thing I have probably ever worn, next to PJ's. I need a dress that is going to tell a story about me and how unique and funny and different I am. I need it to embrace my curves and show off my incredible parts and hide those that I don't like so much. I need something that says "That is so her". And boy does this pack a punch, but at over £1000.00 it was waaay out of my budget to even consider this as a contender, even if I wasn't ready to buy!

In between second and fourth, I tried on what can only be described as a white lacy version of a sheath condom. Literally felt as though I was a white tube with a glittery belt around the middle. It was not pretty, hence no picture! Consoling ourselves with some very delicious mini sandwiches and cakes all washed down with a good helping of Prosecco and tea it was soon back to the changing room and we had saved the biggest till last! 

Dress Number Four! The dream. At least so far and very much on par with The glittering Stella York gown. The huge white, LQ Designs dress was in budget at under £700, maybe even under £600, this fabulous ballgown from LQ designs is fit for a princess. The fitted lace bodice is delicately finished with classy off the shoulder style straps. The full skirt hangs beautifully with the horsehair ribbon edging for a royal look. And best of all it fit like a glove. With only minor altering to the hem of the dress to make it a lot shorter (needing a good six or seven inches off) I could have quite literally walked out of that place with a wedding dress under £700. Nevertheless I stuck to my guns as I had said to myself prior to even walking in through the doors that I would not be purchasing my wedding gown so far in advance as my mood and thoughts change with every moment that passes. 

Despite trying on some incredible and beautiful gowns and dresses on Saturday afternoon I think I have not found the one yet. And so the hunt continues and I am sure to be booking in a few more sessions with different bridal suppliers to find out what types of dresses really benefit and suit me. I need a dress that says me without me even wearing it and as yet, whilst they are all amazing beyond belief and very enticingly priced, I have yet to find her - The dress of dreams

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx