Hello Dears,
Christmas is always a stress most years and always full of important questions that need answering. Who do we visit on what days, when do we serve turkey dinner, has Grandma had enough to drink yet and why is Auntie Rosie bringing her new boyfriend of six-days along to the festivities (He hasn't even got a job or brought me a present). But this year, unlike others where I have had to buy presents for people that are slightly more older than Thomas the Tank Engine and Peppa Pig. I have had to buy presents for little people and with little or no guidance. I mean yes obviously I have had three little boys to buy for, although they are not so little now and are probably expecting an Xbox or PlayStation from their big cousin rather than the usual pyjamas or a cosy hoodie. They were easy. I didn't really have to somewhat impress their parents because we were all family and like it or not tough shit we're all related so there is no real getting out of it. But this year it matters ...
Now I haven't gone overboard on the whole present buying this year. Well OK maybe I have, spending more than double what I did this year on almost the same amount of people. Although there are a few people whose presents are costing more, but I feel that when there little fat faces light up on Christmas morning, it will all be worth it in the end - Especially what I have planned!
Every year I seem to go over the top not only on spending but also on the excitement levels and whilst normally I can hold out until late November in regards to the excitement levels I have already peaked I feel and the Coca-Cola Lorry hasn't even arrived yet! I think this year, because (obviously) I know what all my loved ones are getting from me I am already excited with the prospect of them opening what will be a wonderful present (if I do say so myself) but also because when you are as thoughtful and as bored on your commute as I am you Internet shop your orders from far an wide. I know that pretty much from end of October, up until a couple of days before the big day there will be post for me every single day. The post lady used to love me at work and always used to say that if I carried on I would be charged a handling fee. Luckily for me that's now my duties in the office so I have the luxury of collecting my own parcels of loveliness.
And that is the other thing! I love on-line shopping because not only do you have the thrill of trying to outbid "TonyKitKat1978" for a vintage Alice in Wonderland Teacup and Saucer Set on eBay, but you then have the excitement of it arriving a few days later and un-packaging it, only to re-wrap it in an equally vintage fashioned paper and big bow, ready to see the Christmas Fairy's face when she opens it and it blows her mind at how good you are for buying presents. FYI- that Alice in Wonderland Teacup and Saucer Set is actually on my Christmas List so if you wanna treat me at this special time of year then do so - Many thanks!
What I have also realised is just how much children's toys are!? I mean seriously?! Twenty or thirty quid seems a bit much but manageable for a small person who may play with it a number of times but as I walked past the shelves I saw forties, fifties, sixties, seventies. I mean why on gods given earth with all its trees to climb, lakes to push water-phobic friends into and fields to run around in would you buy little Danny, the jumped up four-year old pre-teen from Solihull already shoplifting from the local Nisa, a overly priced piece of plastic in the shape of Superman, Starwars or Spongebob Squarepants. All that was about when I walked into a local store last week was toys, toys, toys! Oh and more toys! And whilst it was mostly non-educational junk for boys centred around fighting, cars, army, robots or a TV/Film character; The girls section was far worse than I imagined it to be.
Row after row after row of pink this and flowers that. It made me wanna be sick and I had a vagina! All the little girls toys were about was playing dress-up, being pretty, caring for animals, cleaning and cooking and pretending to do everything a little 1950's housewife would do. There were plenty of pretty dresses and princess costumes but hardly any doctors, vets, lawyers or teachers pretend dress-up. I felt sorry for the youth of today, constantly having their mothers, sisters and aunties drip fed this crap about having to be a girl and do this and do that, to find a man, do the washing and learn to make a sandwich. It was wrong. Girls should be able to do whatever they like and so should little boys. Does anyone really care if little Matilda wanted a science set and a lab coat for her Christmas present rather than My Little Pony Shits-alot! Why? I just don't get it? Maybe it is because I haven't had my own little darlings yet and when I do I will pay the price for a light up Disney Princess Sing-along and scream doll for £89.95 just to keep up with The Jones and to keep her quiet on Christmas day. I mean what ever happened to a couple of books and a orange in the stocking?
When I was little I am glad to say that the Internet was a baby itself and technology as I know it at twenty-four was not in dreams yet let alone existence. This forced me into the sublime serenity of my childhood bedroom where I would spend whole weekends playing in my dolls house creating dramatic scenes that even Eastenders would find challenging. I would also be found in the summer months making mud pies out of dirt and grass with the desperate effort to make my little brother eat them. A few times he did, but then I was told not to make mud pies again. I still made mud pies I just flung them at my lil' bro instead. I had a crystal making set when I was old enough and I have fond memoirs of me and my Daddy trying against all odds to make salt and sugar crystals, coming down every Sunday morning to check if anything had grown.
This is what shaped me and I find it so sad now-days when kids just want to sit and watch a TV show or play a game on a games console or tablet rather than go outdoors and play and imagine. I sometimes wonder what it will do to them socially. In years to come will we just be expected to WhatsApp and Facetime rather than actually meet up. Will people, grown-ups, children, not have the imagination I had as a child? This makes me sad. Which means that I refuse to buy anything nonsensical for the children on my Christmas shopping list. My own children one day will not be Amish, they will have mod-cons such as games consoles, computers and smartphones (when they are old enough) but they will be limited, as will TV. I will allow their minds to be broadened by themselves, to explore, to have adventures and that at the end of the day when I snuggle them up in bed they can tell me the story that even I wouldn't be so crazy as to dream up ...
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
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