So day in and day out I make the journey to work, like most people. Some people cycle, and, on the odd occasion I join them. Some lucky people drive, and, I do not join them. And with that it leaves the rest of us all commuting via public transport. Now if it so happens that you live in Europe, where public transport is some of the best in the world in my view (despite hardly ever using it) or if you live in a big, well connected city like London or another capital town such as Manchester, Edinburgh or Dublin then public transport pretty much sucks ass.
I am a well established 'Bus Wanker' - A term coined from hit UK Telly show 'The Inbetweeners' as a mean derogatory term used for those whom have not yet purchased their own piece of metal on wheels. Now please don't get me wrong I would love to learn to drive and afford my own car but with salaries are being kept at minimum inflation rates both here in Britain but also probably across the world which means any hope of me learning, passing, buying and finally getting on the road are nigh on impossible on my annual income, especially since I have over £700.00 worth of rent, gas, water, electricity and food bills coming out not to mention council tax and the likes coming out of my bank every month it is expensive enough to live alone without throwing a car into the mix as well.
A while ago now, there I was being contacted by an Agency as I was out of work at the time and they have a job that is perfect, the boss thinks I'm fit for the job in hand and all is set up ready for me to start as soon as possible. But wait. What is this? They refuse to give me employment simply because I don't drive and so using public transport would be an inconvenience for them as a company and apparently dangerous for me to travel down long country roads after and before work. This is ridiculous and I cant believe that employers are actually getting away with this. Why would you advertise a job with an immediate start date and urgently needing to be filled if your going to refuse people that are willing to commute and are willing to work. It makes no sense. I wouldn't have minded if it had said "Driving license required" or "Needs to drive due to rural location" but no, nothing. I cant see how this would be missed off a job advertisement if it was essential or at least a preference from an employer. Surely if someone is willing to commute nearly an hour and a half they are good enough for the job. I call this false advertising of the worst kind; getting someones hopes up in offering them a job and then turning them down, just because they don't drive.
I read on-line recently that a lady was offended by the endearing term 'Bus Wanker' and most upset she took to Twitter to voice her concerns: "Whats wrong with the bus, i like it, you get to meet random people of all types, you get a free Metro to read, you can listen to your ipod, you can chat to interesting people, or drink a coffee or can of lemonade etc, have lunch on the run etc. why?" Well dearest questioner, let me enlighten you as to why *Cue twinkly fairytale music*
I think some of the worst things about having to use public transport is the fact that it is always late. Most people who know me are well aware of my inability to be on time for anything (despite my New Years Resolution of 2015) but buses, in all and every capacity I think, are just beyond silly sometimes. You could meet a man, get married, have 3.4 children with him, divorce and then have a heart attack all in the time it takes for the sodding bus to arrive. It always seems as well that buses and trains are never punctual when you need them to be. Job interviews, meetings and appointments, all of them cancelled, post-poned or delayed because of some technical error or human cock-up!
Something that has really annoyed me recently and for the last like forever is this. When your terribly late for something, job interview, work or meeting friends then it is the ultimate frustration when you get onto a bus or a train in that matter of fact and it ends up not going anywhere. Now obviously the reason for this is that it is not scheduled to leave once I am on board, but its annoying when your in a hurry and you need to get somewhere fast. Then, when it is time to go it just poodles on down the road, or tracks without a care in the world. No urgency. Just bumbling along like its on a jolly kids cartoon. Really gets on my nerves!
Another thing that really gets on my wick is this. I'm on a bus on the way to somewhere of importance. Nothing is awry, Bus is on time and I'm happily hungry so I crack out my nachos that I have just bought from a bangin' High Street food chain we all know and love (especially after a night out) - Subway. There I am tucking into a quick snack when a little old lady, sweet as you like pokes her nose in and points at the sign on the bus door. 'No food or drink allowed to be consumed on this bus' it reads. Courteously yet peeved and wishing the Grim Reaper was lurking about, I stop and put my nachos away. "Moany old bag, just on you way for a coffin fitting are we dear?" I thought, angrily. I think someone must have been jealous, I mean who does she think she is - The bus queen. Her Majesty Stagecoach. Queen Eliz-a-bus. I don't think so!
So as the bus pulls out of the station I am starting to get more and more agitated at the fact she has halted my munch time! About ten minutes into the journey I notice an Asian mother and her children on the bus when the mother gives her child a pear. I think nothing of it until it dawns on me that the Bus Queen is not interrupting their snacking. Why I think? Maybe it is because if a little old white lady in her seventy's asked an Asian women to stop her little Asian boy from eating a pear on board a bus then she would probably be shown the racist card and maybe even the finger coupled with a few choice words. So I keep quiet but secretly think to myself about how an adorable Asian boy with curly locks and big brown cow-eyes can eat a pear with his Mummy but me, a single twenty-something young (beautiful, intelligent, witty) women isn't allowed to eat her nachos in peace. I mean it's not like there is a law stating that you cannot eat on the bus. Smoking is illegal (In the UK anyway) but consumption food or beverage is not 'Queen Eliz-a-bus' so next time butt out, or my nachos will be going splat-chos all over your face.
And with that I now come to the end of a long rant about public transport and retire to my bed, where I will rise in the morning and take the bus to work.
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
Another thing that really gets on my wick is this. I'm on a bus on the way to somewhere of importance. Nothing is awry, Bus is on time and I'm happily hungry so I crack out my nachos that I have just bought from a bangin' High Street food chain we all know and love (especially after a night out) - Subway. There I am tucking into a quick snack when a little old lady, sweet as you like pokes her nose in and points at the sign on the bus door. 'No food or drink allowed to be consumed on this bus' it reads. Courteously yet peeved and wishing the Grim Reaper was lurking about, I stop and put my nachos away. "Moany old bag, just on you way for a coffin fitting are we dear?" I thought, angrily. I think someone must have been jealous, I mean who does she think she is - The bus queen. Her Majesty Stagecoach. Queen Eliz-a-bus. I don't think so!
So as the bus pulls out of the station I am starting to get more and more agitated at the fact she has halted my munch time! About ten minutes into the journey I notice an Asian mother and her children on the bus when the mother gives her child a pear. I think nothing of it until it dawns on me that the Bus Queen is not interrupting their snacking. Why I think? Maybe it is because if a little old white lady in her seventy's asked an Asian women to stop her little Asian boy from eating a pear on board a bus then she would probably be shown the racist card and maybe even the finger coupled with a few choice words. So I keep quiet but secretly think to myself about how an adorable Asian boy with curly locks and big brown cow-eyes can eat a pear with his Mummy but me, a single twenty-something young (beautiful, intelligent, witty) women isn't allowed to eat her nachos in peace. I mean it's not like there is a law stating that you cannot eat on the bus. Smoking is illegal (In the UK anyway) but consumption food or beverage is not 'Queen Eliz-a-bus' so next time butt out, or my nachos will be going splat-chos all over your face.
And with that I now come to the end of a long rant about public transport and retire to my bed, where I will rise in the morning and take the bus to work.
'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx
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