A Dog's Life ...

Evening all,
 
So after my girlie weekend away I have come back relaxed and refreshed. It hasn't been without its spills though. nearly becoming human ice-cubes waiting for a cab after going to the theatre, arguments over who stank out the bathroom last and living off of pizza and fizzy drinks for an entire weekend are all highlights, not to mention the fact that I we all played truth or dare for many hours whilst getting unsuccessfully drunk. However this weekend has been much of an eye-opener to me, although Miss Tweedle-Dee and Miss Tweedle-Dumb shall never know. Being away from my home area made me realise how secretly lonely I am. I mean I'm not going to be investing in a cat any time soon ... I'm not that lonely, but It did make me think about my relationship status and even more so about putting myself up on the shelf again. Thing is though, its a high shelf and a log way to fall if it all goes wrong again. That and how ca I guarantee that I wont just be left there? I know I'm only young at 21 but I found myself straying from the girls, wondering round the baby section of an expensive department store; cooing and touching all the toys and blankets, clothes and furnishings for a child's nursery. A familiar feeling returned to me that reminded me that, whilst on contraception and not wanting to start a family until I had a marriage and stability, my biological clock was ticking by. I tried to bring up the subject as Miss Tweedle-Dee, Miss Tweedle-Dumb and I traipsed around. Strangely it was Miss Tweedle-Dee who sympathised and expressed the same concern, whereas Miss Tweedle-Dumb who is settled and in a steady relationship is not so worried. It truly terrifies me that I shall get to an age where I have nothing to show for my time on this planet, not a marriage, career or child in site. Just me. Alone. I am praying that this is never the case.
 
On a lighter note, the girls and I all made a trip to a well-know 'adult' high street store and whilst a very British me just blushed and stood around looking embarrassed and out of place, Miss Tweedle-Dee and Miss Tweedle-Dumb decided to invest in a 'life-enhancing personal device'. After much negotiation and begging they gave in with trying to convince me to buy one and themselves went up to the counter and completed their seedy purchases separately. I on the other hand, within minutes of getting home on the Sunday evening was online looking at things that vibrate, swivel, pulse, gyrate, bend and twist. Its ordered for delivery tomorrow. At work. I hope its not too obvious. Could be quite awkward explaining away a buzzing box to the boss? Its not that I'm frigid or non-sexual, Its just that I'm indifferent to it. If you offered me sex with the right person (and from previous experience the wrong ones too) I would gladly oblige. But somehow self-exploration is way down on my to do list of a night. I would much rather eat unhealthy snacks and watch telly wrapped up in bed, thank-you. Funnily enough I was discussing this with Mr. Mot last week. He had asked why I didn't 'indulge' and I responded in the only way I know how - I giggled and brushed it off. But there is no getting around Mr. Mot, oh-no; so I gave in and spilled. "Why should I bother trying to do it myself and get no-where when I can just find someone who can do it much better than I can and produce better results?" At this point I had rather pissed on Mr. Mot's bonfire as I think he was hoping that the conversation would progress in its usual late-night manner. I tried to explain that ever since I was sexually curious there had always been someone around to lend a hand as it were. They came and they went but my most constant and regular entertainer was a big secret to all who knew me in school.

Mr. Woof liked the oddest of things, hence the naming here. We have been friends since meeting in the second year of High School and pretty much as soon as we met our liaisons began. In school, Mr. Woof was quite shy when it came to being in 'public' as it were but behind a few closed corridor doors and next to my green locker he was a demanding animal that like to rule and be ruled. Mr. Woof had a fondness for his own nipples being pleasured and enjoyed me playing with them very much. Several times we nearly got caught in the act, and I am sure that on many occasions my tutor knew something odd was happening outside her classroom - I mean, who spends nearly three hour-long lunchtimes a week standing by a locker "hugging" a friend. As we got older the intensity was stepped up. Math class was shared sitting next to each other whilst Mr. Woof's hands wandered over my school skirt and I talked to him about the work in a low, sensual voice. During a Saturday morning revision class Mr. Woof and I met early and went into one of the new recently built toilets. There we experimented with soft foreplay, biting, sucking, scratching. The fact that I was wearing glasses and had purposely worn red lipstick was something of a turn on for him, even now. I knew what I was doing, any sixteen year old does. It was fun and I enjoyed the secrecy of it all. The little affair with the boy who I had a crush on for ages and who was dating one of my closest school friends. Of course all secrets come out eventually and after that everything was on hold for a while until it quietened down again. But I had lost a good friend and lots of other pals had also turned there backs on me because of the leaked liaisons.

After school ended we went our separate ways, developed as people and went into study. I went on to have several partners and loose my virginity with someone who actually meant something to me, whereas he attempted university, dropped out discovered drink and drugs and continued to think that his rock band would become the next big thing. Mr. Woof turned into something of a womaniser and was well known for being a Harlequin. Rumour had it he lost his virginity to a forty year-old beside the bins at the back of a local pub. Classy! Mr. Woof made an appearance throughout my love-life, weather I was with someone or not, however it must be noted that none of my ex-partners ever took a liking to him. Mr. Woof and I had lost contact for a while after Mr. Workaholic had banned me from communicating with him, but got back in touch a few months after we split. It started as it always had with a "Hi, how are you?" and a person to make me laugh which was hard at that time. After reading the Fifty Shades novels I decided to embark on something of my own contract. And so we began another affair. Again I knew what I was getting into, but unlike in school where by I had a major crush on this guy, I had just come out of a long term relationship and needed something that was no-strings-attached fun. Something to make me smile and brighten up my otherwise gloomy day. Mostly it was just phone calls, usually relieving Mr. Woof of some form. Any time I would be there to answer his calls - late night, my lunch hour at work, even three-in the morning; you name it I did every possible shift. A round the clock help-line I suppose. But I enjoyed it, it brought me relief and helped me boost my self-esteem. Admittedly Mr. Woof was into some weirder things now we were older, ad I don't suppose Fifty Shades helped either. Strap-on's, dressing him in women's clothes, nipple clamps, name-calling and spitting were all part an parcel of our verbally drawn up contract. For once I wasn't on the receiving end and was able to dish out punishment like mash at dinner time. On one occasion, late at night I had grown tired and was knowledgeable to the fact that he was close and so told him to bark for me. Mr. Woof hesitated at first but after demanding it he obliged and barked softly. Upon further instruction from his mistress he woofed louder at which point must have felt good as he finished, panting that it was the best session yet.

Encounters like this make me smile with happiness, knowing that I can bring pleasure and relief to someone is a good feeling and to be in control and dominate someone id a great feeling I had never experienced before Mr. Woof came along - pardon the pun. I like the fact that nothing is hidden, all cards are on the table and we ca be honest about the fact that what we have be it past and future is no strings attached fun with no feelings getting involved and therefore avoiding a messy end situation. And whilst we are not in contact at the moment, I am sure that it wont be before long that he has finished with the most recent Beau on the block and comes crawling back to his mistress!

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx