Fin d'une époque ...

Evening All, 

Collecting my dearest Vivienne on Thursday evening (after numerous occasions being told it was ready and then it was not) I was more than excited to hit the road in her little Pumpkin coloured shell. Heading to the doctors, supermarkets and even being so kind as to drop Mr. Warehouse off to work on Friday morning, bright and early at seven in the morning. 

Arriving at work, just minute after dropping off the boyfriend it suddenly hit me that this would be my last day here at a company where I had been for over two-and-half-years. The place where my life began. Who knew that walking through those doors all those many moons ago that I would not only acquire the skills for dealing with difficult customers, sales reps and colleagues, but also that I would learn things about myself, like how to love again, trust and make friends. I never expected that I would get a taste for anything more than just a job to pass time and fill up the years before I settled down to have children. I know now that I want more than that for myself and my future. I want to have a job my children can be proud of, doing something that I am good at with people whom I enjoy being around. Some would go as far as to say that I had all of that at the place I had just left, but there was more to life and I needed to spread my wings and fly off for a new adventure. Oh, and the money helped I suppose?! 

Walking to my desk for the last time and placing my new car keys on the wooden finish I was sad to be leaving. With a tear in my eye I had plenty of work to be getting on with and so, before anyone could distract me, I rallied on with my inbox. As lunchtime approached I had already seen so many people, popping into the offices to say goodbye. Some of them drivers, some of them engineers and technicians; All of them friends and some of them even more. So many people questioned if I really had to go. 
"Maybe it is all one big joke and I will see you here again next week, laughing about how you fooled us all, yeah?" someone said. I wish it were true. I wish I could stay. But it was a decision I had made and now that the wheels were in motion I couldn't turn back now. If I did it would have been one of life's biggest regrets for me and I would always be left wondering 'What if?!'

I mean don't get me wrong there were moments over that last fortnight whereby I worked my notice that I thought I can't wait to get out of the rut I had found myself in. A constant cycle of boredom and repetitive non-sensical tasks that made no difference to my working life apart from making my job harder and more complex than it needed to be. I had walked into that place a twenty-two year old girl who didn't know what she was doing or  what she wanted from life. But I was handed a newborn of a company and asked to raise it into something respectable, which I like to think I did; Very, very well. But now, nearly three-years on I was in my mid-twenties and wanting to be taken more seriously with more responsibilities and managing more than just schedules. But this was something that would never happen there. I needed to be treated like an adult and given responsibility and room to grow as opposed to being undermined and questioned constantly.

But for every moment that I thought thank fuck, there was a million more in the back of my head asking: 'What an earth am I doing - Am I doing the right thing?'! With all the training and compiling all my workload into one Fountain of Knowledge Bible for whoever was brave enough to step into my shoes I hadn't really had time to think or realise that this was it. I was not sure if I was ready to leave. But as the time approached to go home, I realised that I would not be saying "See you Monday" but "Goodbye" for good. Of course I would see them all again, most of them were practically family anyway so I would have no choice but to see them around. But it was devastating saying my farewell messages to those that weren't such regular faces. A few tears from Miss Hackney and the Storeman whom I had grown very fond of were certainly testers in my confidence to leave.

Goodbye gifts in hand from my wonderful work colleagues including Christmas baubles (Because I had already started my Christmas Countdown) Cinderella Goodies (Because of that one time I dressed as Cinders and won my award for Administrator of the Year) and car stuff for my gorgeous Vivienne, whom everyone was cooing over in the car park; I picked up my box of belongings that had creeped into my work space over the last few years and descended the stairs. Bidding farewell to the building I had practically called home I walked through the green glass door for the last time. Walking out into the freshly chilled air I looked back at the bricks and mortar. I became tearful and fell into the arms of Mr. Warehouse who had come to meet me from work on my last day and to head to the pub for some after works drinks to send me off in style. 

After a weekend of driving and seeing friends and family I was ready to start my new job. Only my first day today but will definitely look forward to the coming days and weeks. Hopefully I will become a part of their family and they will accept me as a bright, intelligent and witty work colleague whom not only can be fun and playful but also reliable and integral part of the team. 

'Til next time, Love A.Lou xx